The older I get, the more realise that actually, I don’t like change. Maybe that’s an ‘age’ thing :s. As much as I value growth and evolving, I like it on my own terms and at my own pace. When it’s dictated to me by other things and forces, it throws me for a loop and I contemplate, spitting out my dummy and throwing a tantrum on the supermarket floor. It takes me some time to readjust because I had my heart and mind set on a particular ideal. The end result is that I am exceptionally hard on myself.
I have experienced major changes of late and none of which I have orchestrated, well, I obviously played a part in it, but when I refer to my 5 year plan, errrrhhh yeah this wasn’t in it. Moving house, job, finances, relationships, it’s all one big blur that I’m sifting through.
What I’d really like to do is stop the tape, press rewind and go back to January 2015, and I am being deadly serious lol. Do you ever feel this way?
I learnt recently through my mentor, that I have a habit of not leaving room for ‘life’ to happen when I make my goals/plans. It’s an all or nothing type of situation, which then sends me into a downward spiral when things don’t go accordingly. The underlining trait here is that I am a control freak and I can admit that.
Change is the only thing constant, how do we deal with it when it comes unexpectedly?
I like to use myself as an example on my posts sometimes because I wouldn’t want anyone to think that I am not susceptible to life and its woes- I am, trust me.
Back to the question. Well firstly, you have to get into the ebb and flow of life, the more you resist the inevitable change, the harder it will be for you in the long run. Some things are going to happen with or without your input, you might as well get in line.
Secondly, take some time out to re-evaluate things. Often times we think of things as they could be and not as they are. By that I mean, thinking of the worst case scenarios and hypothesizing and wholly missing out on what’s actually taking place now. Let it go, learn to be creative and form a new utopia with what you have.
Thirdly, whatever has happened has happened. There is little to no sense going over what’s occurred and whose fault it is, it’s thoroughly futile to do that. The only time it is productive to do so, is if it is to find a resolution and not repeat the same mistake, outside of that, leave it alone, move on.
I must reiterate that it IS crucial that you assess the contributions you made to X results so that you can adjust and make improvements. It’s a sure-fire way to cultivate growth.
Lastly and probably most importantly, it’s as much about the journey as it is the destination. Don’t bypass the journey in trance of the destination.
Be here now.
P.s I have not forgotten about my motivational muse on Monday’s, I am preparing them. J
PPS This tone of this post is a bit direct, I can sense it, but believe me when I say it is said out of love and care xoxo