Author Archives: Irene Ephraim

Follow Through

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When I thought of today’s word, I’d already accepted that I had very little of it. Routines and monotony are not my strong suits. And then I looked up the definition and I was surprised.
It’s shifted my perspective and has given me food for thought. 
We use discipline to strictly imply no stick-to-it-ness, but it’s official meaning indicates something a bit different. 

Discipline 

1. the practice of training people to obey rules or a code of behaviour, using punishment to correct disobedience. 

2. a branch of knowledge, typically one studied in higher education.

There are other definitions but these are the commonly recognised ones.
The words that stood out to me (and not in the best way) were obey rules, code of behaviour & punishment.

This insight has given me greater permission to limit self-flagellation, because I’m a human being and not something to be subjugated.
What might be a better descriptor for we need more of is tenacity, determination, commitment, persistence, consistency or perseverance. It is not discipline that’s missing as no one needs to be punished, penalised or forced into line, which is what many of us think when we consider ourselves lacking.

Words are potent, know its spell and be intentional.

Xo

Buy LBC a coffee xo

LATEST POSTS

I Made It

33 held so much for me. I felt like I couldn’t fully exhale for a few reasons.Give or take the inaccuracies of reported history, Jesus was 33 when he ascended. My late friend was also 33 when he ascended. And a small part of me had come to anticipate that this too could be my …

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by Irene Ephraim

CAN YOU HEAR YOURSELF?

The constant chatter is overwhelming. One person says this, another person says that. Your mum says it’s this way, your brother says it’s the other. Then there’s the people who love to be contrarian with no actual thoughts of their own, just adept at piggybacking off what a group of people might agree upon and finding a …

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by Irene Ephraim

Cloudy With A Chance Of…

One day you’re fine, life is good and the air is filled with prospects that you could almost pluck them like the squiggly lines you see when you look at a blue sky. The following day however, you’re freezing your bits off, your umbrella is inside out and the contents of your bag have just …

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by Irene Ephraim

The Improbable Is Still Possible 

Improbable–not likely to be true or to happen.I saw a TikTok of a guy doing the improbable. Getting two basketballs into a hoop using a crutch, throwing a CD into a moving Wii console, releasing ping pong balls with the aim of reaching various points and so on.   It was fascinating to watch. In a different …

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by Irene Ephraim

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Self vs Self

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Ego–A person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance.
A slippery slope or protective armour? I’d it’s both.

It’s also described as the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity.

The ego is accused of many things, namely in negative outcomes, as if it’s something that exists outside of a person’s being.
In some ways I suppose it does, as it is influenced & stimulated by a myriad of external factors.
On the flipside, it’s the reason you do better and evolve. And it’s important to acknowledge that too.

The ego is not absolute. Its neither ‘good’ or ‘bad’, it’s everything and nothing at all, its neutral, it’s all of those things until you inform it otherwise.
The next time you go to blame your ego, think about how you see it and what you have fed it, because at the the end of the day, that ego is you.

Xo

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LATEST POSTS

A Long Way From Home

Sometimes, it is necessary to look back. I randomly came across email exchanges from 14 years ago. What I saw shocked, embarrassed and made me laugh until tears fell. My verbal communication was abysmal. How did anyone ever engage in written conversation with me? and furthermore why? Were they nuts?! I didn’t go looking for …

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by Irene Ephraim

Treat It Like An Exam

Treat it like an exam. This came to me at 7:46am this morning.  I was pondering on the how’s of a particular thing. I quickly snapped out of it like a Raven Baxter premonition because the ‘how’ is none of my business. The ‘do’ is where it’s at. And by do, that means doing it …

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by Irene Ephraim

Accelerate Your Life

The New Year is fast approaching, and it’s the time many people begin to reflect and go over the year. It’s at this point that people panic and have great anxiety over what they did or didn’t do and resolve to do better…in the new year.Why wait, when you can get a headstart now. One …

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by Irene Ephraim

Little Pockets Of Joy

Joy is usually reserved for the ‘big’ moments. Moments like a new car, house, engagement, pregnancy, job and the like. It’s also solely thought of as something that is given to you, rather than something you can cultivate for yourself. This is where Little Pockets of Joy comes in. I believe in en•joy•ment of the …

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by Irene Ephraim

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Easy Breezy

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When the sky cries and the sun smiles, a ray of colourful light is a reminder of their alliance; to dance always. 

Easeful–Providing comfort or peace.
Nature gives me that.
It works in order, at its own pace void of who, what, where and when. 

Trees do not struggle to grow nor wonder how will they grow, they just do. They do so with other types of trees right next to them, side by side, swaying, saying sweet nothings to each other. It’s easeful. 

If we took cues from the ease at which the elements and all of nature work (together), our lives would be different. 

To experience ease, stop resisting or forcing. Align with your circadian rhythm. Allow others to do the same, and refrain from projecting onto them.

Xo

Buy a coffee for me xo

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Promise + Possibilities 

Promise– the quality of potential excellence.Possibilities– a thing that may happen or be the case. That we get to be here and experience a new week full of promise and possibilities is magical. I love that for us. Who knows what wonderful, delightful thing may happen to and for us. The promise within that, makes me …

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by Irene Ephraim

Winning in Real Life

Successful 1. accomplishing a desired aim or result. 2. having achieved fame, wealth, or social status. The media will have you believe that houses, cars, money, having a partner, and followers are the epitome of success. We inherently know this isn’t true, yet we still uphold them as markers of significant value. We yearn to have …

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by Irene Ephraim

Follow Through

When I thought of today’s word, I’d already accepted that I had very little of it. Routines and monotony are not my strong suits. And then I looked up the definition and I was surprised. It’s shifted my perspective and has given me food for thought. We use discipline to strictly imply no stick-to-it-ness, but it’s official meaning …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Self vs Self

Ego–A person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance.A slippery slope or protective armour? I’d it’s both. It’s also described as the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity. The ego is accused of many things, namely in negative outcomes, …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

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A November to Remember

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1.11.21 
I love the first day of the month, especially when it lands on a Monday. 
For each day this week I’ll be posting a word to ponder on. 

Today’s word is:
Detach 
1. disengage (something or part of something) and remove it.
2. leave or separate oneself from (a group or place).

For me, this means letting go of what’s happened, and focusing on what is. It looks like freeing myself daily from being held hostage to my 25 year old thoughts of who I expected myself to be at this point. 
I do this by confirming (not affirming) my presence in the present, i.e observing what is literally in front of me. Then I ask what can I do in this moment for me, my environment or immediate future? And that may be cooking a tasty meal with love and intention, beautifying my space, handling personal admin, or doing absolutely nothing!

What does detaching look like to you?

Xo

A Little Value For the Value

LATEST POSTS

Easy Breezy

When the sky cries and the sun smiles, a ray of colourful light is a reminder of their alliance; to dance always.  Easeful–Providing comfort or peace.Nature gives me that. It works in order, at its own pace void of who, what, where and when.  Trees do not struggle to grow nor wonder how will they grow, …

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by Irene Ephraim

Belief–An Acceptance That Something Exists

I made myself stupid. Hear me out. Years ago, because of an unhealthy level of expectation I placed on myself (which stemmed from comparison), I would harshly judge what I said and how I said it. I would go over every minute detail and pick myself apart mentally, with the underlying message being you’re not …

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by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 10–My Life In Paris

This episode is about my experience of being a Black Brit who moved from London to Paris in a pandemic. I discuss having covid, language barriers and general challenges of integrating into a new society.

by Irene Ephraim

Forgive–To Cancel a Debt.

Nothing is more important than what you choose to do with the breadth of your life. To not forgive is to rob yourself of a life you deserve. …but alas it is you that has been sentenced to a life in prison.  Unforgiveness* is a treacherous con artist because it deceives you into thinking you’re …

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by Irene Ephraim

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Belief–An Acceptance That Something Exists

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I made myself stupid. Hear me out.

Years ago, because of an unhealthy level of expectation I placed on myself (which stemmed from comparison), I would harshly judge what I said and how I said it. I would go over every minute detail and pick myself apart mentally, with the underlying message being you’re not smart enough, you have to do better.
We think these types of statements will encourage us to improve, but instead, it has the opposite effect because as a man (subconscious) thinketh, so is he.

The lack of belief in my abilities caused me to self-fulfil the fear in my own words. I was becoming stupid.

Once that information came into my awareness, I little by little, changed the internal conversations I was having about myself. This meant every time I said something not in alignment with the truth, I verbally cancelled those words/thoughts and replaced it with what I intentionally chose to believe about myself.
These small adjustments however, rarely feel impactful at first. It’s not until one ordinary day, as you’re putting the washed dishes away, do you realise your beliefs have changed and so have your circumstances.
Words have meaning & thoughts become things; don’t underestimate the power in your thoughts or words or things.

Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right

Henry Ford

Xo

A Little Value For The Value

LATEST POSTS

A November to Remember

1.11.21 I love the first day of the month, especially when it lands on a Monday. For each day this week I’ll be posting a word to ponder on.  Today’s word is:Detach 1. disengage (something or part of something) and remove it.2. leave or separate oneself from (a group or place). For me, this means letting go of …

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by Irene Ephraim

What Are You Looking At? 

A video of Kim K came across my sight over the weekend. It was her on SNL. I watched it and it dawned on me that I have no idea what she and her family were up to these days.  It’s fascinating what can change once you set your eyes on something entirely different.  I regularly …

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by Irene Ephraim

Finishing Well

I visited the Musée Yves Saint Laurent on Sunday and was re-energised by what I saw. For the designer, it was more than just clothes that looked good, it was art, curated by passion, breaking moulds and forging new ways to be seen and felt. As I perused his wears, studied the fabrics, observed the …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

September

The feeling of a crisp Monday morning cannot be replicated by any other day of the week. It’s full of both promise and dread in equal amounts. What will it bring? What will I have to tackle? What joy will I experience? What task might feel too great? And whilst you marinate on it, you’ll …

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by Irene Ephraim

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Forgive–To Cancel a Debt.

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Nothing is more important than what you choose to do with the breadth of your life.

To not forgive is to rob yourself of a life you deserve.

…but alas it is you that has been sentenced to a life in prison. 

Unforgiveness* is a treacherous con artist because it deceives you into thinking you’re punishing the offender, but alas it is you that has been sentenced to a life in prison. 

No one or thing should hold such power over you, no matter how dastardly the situation. And yes, there are many horrific experiences strong enough to desire exacting revenge or retribution, but at what cost? In reality, the lengths we may go to to punish a person, is seldom equal to the offence or pain caused, nor is it truly gratifying.

Forgive them and forgive yourself. Do it for you, and your prosperity. And in doing so, you will experience more freedom, a lightness, and have greater room to embrace the sweetness of life in its fullness.
This is the true win.

Xo

P.s Thank you for seeing me.

*Not an acknowledged word but should be.

A Little Value For The Value

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Back to Life, Back to Reality.

And if you’re seeing this post, it’s an indication that at least for today, I won. Whew! Returning to the blog after an unplanned period away, is like that first day at the gym after falling off for months. It takes a whole lot to get there. On this occasion, the distance was due to Covid. …

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by Irene Ephraim

Question It

Fortuitously, I picked up this book recently to re-read it for the umpteenth time and the words below reflect my sentiments in this post. Much of our education of the world comes from other sources. We seldom form and realise our own ideas about it till much later on in life, if ever at all. …

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by Irene Ephraim

Face Your Front

Face your front is a commonly known Nigerian expression, meaning to look ahead, pay attention to your affairs and stop watching others. The irony is the exact opposite expression also exists, and its ‘Look at your mates’, but we will unpack that another time. How much further along might you be if you pull backed some …

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by Irene Ephraim

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What Are You Looking At? 

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A video of Kim K came across my sight over the weekend. It was her on SNL. 
I watched it and it dawned on me that I have no idea what she and her family were up to these days. 

It’s fascinating what can change once you set your eyes on something entirely different. 

I regularly take inventory of what’s around me in my space, what I’m looking at, what I’m listening to, as I recognise how easy it is to be influenced by unwanted things. And whatever I discover that is no longer in alignment, I remove.

People underestimate how much what you hear or see repeatedly, informs what you think and do. Little and big things will shape the lens at which you view things, and this is why it is imperative that you to protect your peace, build your immunity and purposefully cultivate your community. 

If something isn’t quite right, analyse what is on your doorstep and hire + fire accordingly–You are the guardian.

Xo

P.s The end of era is nigh. I am hanging this up soon. Thank you.

A Little Value For The Value

Latest from the Blog

It Didn’t Work

It didn’t work. Didn’t it? Or did you give up after the first attempt?  We’ve become accustomed to expecting microwave results. We no longer believe in the art of cultivating, nurturing or giving of ourselves to a thing. We want it, and we want it now.  I often go back to what I was like as a child. …

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Endless Excuses

We are full of excuses. Excuses that hinder, inhibit, and can foster stagnation. And yes, sometimes they are valid and substantiated, however, they are only as powerful as we say they are. I often remember what a coach said to me once, after I poured out my heart and laid out my issues regarding overcoming …

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WDYWM?! Episode 8–Moving On

London to Paris–that’s the move I made during a pandemic. I talk about the good, bad and uncomfortable things about starting a new life somewhere different.

Finishing Well

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I visited the Musée Yves Saint Laurent on Sunday and was re-energised by what I saw.

For the designer, it was more than just clothes that looked good, it was art, curated by passion, breaking moulds and forging new ways to be seen and felt.
As I perused his wears, studied the fabrics, observed the silhouettes, it was clear that immense thought and intention went into his work. He took his time.

His office

Society will tell you you’re not moving fast enough, and that you need to constantly churn out great results all the time, but what effect does that have on the quality of what you’re doing and more importantly, you?
The focus these days is on how quickly you can produce anything and make money, money, money! Outrage and shock is the new currency and we are all suffering because of this untameable beast, but I digress.

What I’d like to stress instead, is to move at your own pace, whichever speed that may be. Choose quality over quantity and allow room for things to breathe and naturally evolve.
It is perfectly okay to take your time and finish well.

Xo

A Little Value For The Value

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Lean In

I love knowing everything. I like to know what I’m doing, where I’m doing it, who I’m doing it with (don’t be nasty), and how I’m doing it. I like my t’s crossed and i’s dotted, but that’s not life. Life is full of beautiful, unpredictable, and transformative unknowns and you only get to find …

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by Irene Ephraim

One Day You’ll Be Old

One day you will be old. At least I hope to be. As I prepared for bed last night, I took one more glance in the mirror to observe myself, and I had an epiphany; one day I’ll be old and this skin that I’m waiting on to get better, will have lived life and …

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by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 6–Unravelling

What I thought 2019 would be vs what it is was. I felt like I was dragged through the mud, but there is light at the end of the tunnel, even if you have to fight tooth and nail for it! I share some of the difficulties of life and adulting.

by Irene Ephraim

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September

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The feeling of a crisp Monday morning cannot be replicated by any other day of the week. It’s full of both promise and dread in equal amounts.
What will it bring? What will I have to tackle? What joy will I experience? What task might feel too great? And whilst you marinate on it, you’ll never know for certain until you embark on it.
Isn’t it exciting and empowering that you and I, in small and big ways can contribute to what we encounter this week? Such power.
Let’s use it wisely to set intentions, renew commitments, release the ones that no longer fit, and allow room for whatever needs to be done, seen or felt.

Here’s to a stupendous week ahead (this is my intention) xo

A Little Value for the Value

LATEST POSTS

You vs Society

When I take an unexpected break (which I am now calling a mid-season break), I usually return with an explanation in hand.I’m not doing that today (maybe later), and I hope by the end of this read, you too will choose yourself and your best interests. Society demands that you work incessantly. It’s crammed down …

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by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 5–Flights and Fights

There is so much of the world to see and experience, and what better way to do that than with friends and family, unless…you fight, fall out and break up! I speak on some of my trips, what happened and whether we bounced back, or not.

by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 4–Shipped and Left Behind

We all have events that have changed the course of our lives and who we are today. I share my experience on being uprooted from everything I knew, to start a life at a private boarding school in what was then a foreign country to me.

by Irene Ephraim

Bursting at the Seams.

Man, the pressure. The pressure to be and do all is immense.  I have been on the go for the past couple of months, and I was afraid of a burnout.To avoid that, I gave myself an impromptu annual leave from creating last week. The weekend rolls around, quickly might I add, and a recollection of …

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by Irene Ephraim

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