Category Archives: Lessons Learnt

CAN YOU HEAR YOURSELF?

Featured

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, ,

The constant chatter is overwhelming. One person says this, another person says that. 
Your mum says it’s this way, your brother says it’s the other. 
Then there’s the people who love to be contrarian with no actual thoughts of their own, just adept at piggybacking off what a group of people might agree upon and finding a way to dismantle and diminish it. 
STOP THE MADNESS! 

In a place of ever increasing thoughts, including my own, take a moment to switch everything off and go back to being in the world where you can touch things, feel people and hear the hum of real life being lived.

Xo
Download 33 Powerful Affirmations and Confirmations for FREE here

33 Powerful Affirmations and ConfirmationsDownload

Accelerate Your Life–A Guide and Workbook to Making Richer Choices was created to support you in moving full steam ahead. Now that the fog has started to clear, it’s time to take things back into your own hands.

Purchase Accelerate Your Life Here
£4.99

Accelerate Your Life–A Guide and Workbook to Making Richer Choices was created to support you in moving full steam ahead. Now that the fog has started to clear, it’s time to take things back into your own hands.

Accelerate Your Life Guide WorkbookDownload
Life

I Made It

33 held so much for me. I felt like I couldn’t fully exhale for a few reasons.Give or take the inaccuracies of reported history, Jesus was 33 when he ascended. My late friend was also 33 when he ascended. And a small part of me had come to anticipate that this too could be my …

Continue reading →

Lessons Learnt

Cloudy With A Chance Of…

One day you’re fine, life is good and the air is filled with prospects that you could almost pluck them like the squiggly lines you see when you look at a blue sky. The following day however, you’re freezing your bits off, your umbrella is inside out and the contents of your bag have just …

Continue reading →

Life

The Improbable Is Still Possible 

Improbable–not likely to be true or to happen.I saw a TikTok of a guy doing the improbable. Getting two basketballs into a hoop using a crutch, throwing a CD into a moving Wii console, releasing ping pong balls with the aim of reaching various points and so on.   It was fascinating to watch. In a different …

Continue reading →

Cloudy With A Chance Of…

Featured

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , ,

One day you’re fine, life is good and the air is filled with prospects that you could almost pluck them like the squiggly lines you see when you look at a blue sky.

The following day however, you’re freezing your bits off, your umbrella is inside out and the contents of your bag have just tipped all over the wet, gum filled floor. You feel as if the wind has been knocked out of you and you’re gasping for that same air. It is bleak.
If it was possible to re-enter the womb, you would. 
How did we get here? Sometimes there’s no rhyme or reason as to why things rapidly change internally for us, but what is important to remember, is that it is not permanent.

When the grip feels firm and it’s hard to see a way out, look up, as this too shall pass. 
You can point to any previous year or era of your life and recall that you once thought you wouldn’t make it out of this phase. And you did.

I looked back at journal entries from a couple of months ago and I saw evidence of good days, great plans and wonderful imaginations. It was a reminder that no matter how crappy the current moment is or what obstacle exists, it is not here to stay and things will always get better.

Xo

Download 33 Powerful Affirmations and Confirmations for FREE here

33-powerful-affirmations-and-confirmationsDownload

Accelerate Your Life–A Guide and Workbook to Making Richer Choices was created to support you in moving full steam ahead. Now that the fog has started to clear, it’s time to take things back into your own hands.

Purchase Accelerate Your Life Here
£4.99

Get a head start on drawing nearer to you, the life of your imagination! Seize opportunities now by using this guide and workbook to Accelerate Your Life!

Accelerate Your Life Guide+ WorkbookDownload
Lessons Learnt

CAN YOU HEAR YOURSELF?

The constant chatter is overwhelming. One person says this, another person says that. Your mum says it’s this way, your brother says it’s the other. Then there’s the people who love to be contrarian with no actual thoughts of their own, just adept at piggybacking off what a group of people might agree upon and finding a …

Continue reading →

Late night

A Long Way From Home

Sometimes, it is necessary to look back. I randomly came across email exchanges from 14 years ago. What I saw shocked, embarrassed and made me laugh until tears fell. My verbal communication was abysmal. How did anyone ever engage in written conversation with me? and furthermore why? Were they nuts?! I didn’t go looking for …

Continue reading →

Lessons Learnt

Treat It Like An Exam

Treat it like an exam. This came to me at 7:46am this morning.  I was pondering on the how’s of a particular thing. I quickly snapped out of it like a Raven Baxter premonition because the ‘how’ is none of my business. The ‘do’ is where it’s at. And by do, that means doing it …

Continue reading →

Treat It Like An Exam

Featured

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life, More Action

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , ,

Treat it like an exam. This came to me at 7:46am this morning. 

I was pondering on the how’s of a particular thing. I quickly snapped out of it like a Raven Baxter premonition because the ‘how’ is none of my business. The ‘do’ is where it’s at. And by do, that means doing it to the best of your ability. 
Treat it like an exam is what I heard next. My senses were piqued. Interesting concept I thought…and it’s on the money. 

When you had to take an exam, you didn’t know what the questions would be. All you knew is that it would be on topics that were covered during the term time.
If you were lucky your teacher would tell you the specific areas the questions would be on. But, we’ve all experienced being told one thing and looking at the paper and thinking wtf, this isn’t what you said?!

Ultimately, the only useful thing to do is to study and prepare as best you can. With the rest, as the saying goes, we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. 

We’re often too focused on being masterminds when there’s only so much dotting your i’s and crossing your t’s you can do. Treat whatever you have going on like an exam; learn, practice and simply give it your best shot.

Xo

Accelerate Your Life–A Guide and Workbook to Making Richer Choices will assist you in defining and redefining where and who you are. By the end of it, you will have a map that you can rely on to quickly take you forward. And best of all, you can use it again and again and again.

Purchase Accelerate Your Life Here
£4.99
Accelerate Your Life Guide + WorkbookDownload

LATEST POSTS

Accelerate Your Life

The New Year is fast approaching, and it’s the time many people begin to reflect and go over the year. It’s at this point that people panic and have great anxiety over what they did or didn’t do and resolve to do better…in the new year.Why wait, when you can get a headstart now. One …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Little Pockets Of Joy

Joy is usually reserved for the ‘big’ moments. Moments like a new car, house, engagement, pregnancy, job and the like. It’s also solely thought of as something that is given to you, rather than something you can cultivate for yourself. This is where Little Pockets of Joy comes in. I believe in en•joy•ment of the …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Promise + Possibilities 

Promise– the quality of potential excellence.Possibilities– a thing that may happen or be the case. That we get to be here and experience a new week full of promise and possibilities is magical. I love that for us. Who knows what wonderful, delightful thing may happen to and for us. The promise within that, makes me …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Winning in Real Life

Successful 1. accomplishing a desired aim or result. 2. having achieved fame, wealth, or social status. The media will have you believe that houses, cars, money, having a partner, and followers are the epitome of success. We inherently know this isn’t true, yet we still uphold them as markers of significant value. We yearn to have …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Loading…

Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.

Accelerate Your Life

Featured

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life, Motivational & Intentional

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The New Year is fast approaching, and it’s the time many people begin to reflect and go over the year.
It’s at this point that people panic and have great anxiety over what they did or didn’t do and resolve to do better…in the new year.
Why wait, when you can get a headstart now. One that has the potential to shift the trajectory of your life, and not just for the year end!

Accelerate Your Life–A Guide and Workbook to Making Richer Choices was created to support you in moving full steam ahead. Now that the fog has started to clear, it’s time to take things back into your own hands.

Much of the overwhelm we feel, is the constant dialogue that goes on in our minds 24/7.
A lot of that are things that will not occur, mixed with where we want to be, alongside what has happened in the past.
How can you see and seize opportunities with confusion, conflict and constant chatter at the forefront?

Accelerate Your Life Guide and Workbook will jumpstart the process of clearing the way, sharpening the vision, and accelerating the elevation.

Accelerate Your Life–A Guide and Workbook to Making Richer Choices will assist you in defining and redefining where and who you are. By the end of it, you will have a map that you can rely on to take you forward. And best of all, you can use it again and again and again.

Purchase Accelerate Your Life Here
£4.99

P.s I have done a lifetime of learning, flying and falling and if I can provide a blueprint and prevent some of the drama for you, that’s exactly what I’ll do!

Accelerate Your Life Guide + WorkbookDownload

I’d love to hear from you.

Forgive–To Cancel a Debt.

Featured

Posted by in Experiences, Lessons Learnt, Life

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

, , , , , , , ,

Nothing is more important than what you choose to do with the breadth of your life.

To not forgive is to rob yourself of a life you deserve.

…but alas it is you that has been sentenced to a life in prison. 

Unforgiveness* is a treacherous con artist because it deceives you into thinking you’re punishing the offender, but alas it is you that has been sentenced to a life in prison. 

No one or thing should hold such power over you, no matter how dastardly the situation. And yes, there are many horrific experiences strong enough to desire exacting revenge or retribution, but at what cost? In reality, the lengths we may go to to punish a person, is seldom equal to the offence or pain caused, nor is it truly gratifying.

Forgive them and forgive yourself. Do it for you, and your prosperity. And in doing so, you will experience more freedom, a lightness, and have greater room to embrace the sweetness of life in its fullness.
This is the true win.

Xo

P.s Thank you for seeing me.

*Not an acknowledged word but should be.

A Little Value For The Value

LATEST POSTS

Follow Through

When I thought of today’s word, I’d already accepted that I had very little of it. Routines and monotony are not my strong suits. And then I looked up the definition and I was surprised. It’s shifted my perspective and has given me food for thought. We use discipline to strictly imply no stick-to-it-ness, but it’s official meaning …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Self vs Self

Ego–A person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance.A slippery slope or protective armour? I’d it’s both. It’s also described as the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity. The ego is accused of many things, namely in negative outcomes, …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Easy Breezy

When the sky cries and the sun smiles, a ray of colourful light is a reminder of their alliance; to dance always.  Easeful–Providing comfort or peace.Nature gives me that. It works in order, at its own pace void of who, what, where and when.  Trees do not struggle to grow nor wonder how will they grow, …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

A November to Remember

1.11.21 I love the first day of the month, especially when it lands on a Monday. For each day this week I’ll be posting a word to ponder on.  Today’s word is:Detach 1. disengage (something or part of something) and remove it.2. leave or separate oneself from (a group or place). For me, this means letting go of …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Loading…

Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.

Navigating Your 30’s, You Should…

30 Wednesday Dec 2020

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

, , , , , , , , ,


On the 17th, I turned 33. My Jesus Year.
Whew. I can finally say that without thinking and feeling impending gloom (shout out to therapy). 

In the last year I have seen various conversations online about how incredible it is once you get to your 30’s and the leaps and bounds you make. I don’t disagree that it can be all those things, however a lot of people do not share those sentiments, and I want to say that it’s perfectly okay not to.

For years (and I’m still unlearning), there has been an unhealthy attachment with age and accomplishment. We have my beautiful, problematic and rich culture to thank for that. 

As a result of such indoctrination, I have walked around with an internal metric system, tallying up where I should be, at this each (st)age. Things like how I should look, what job I should have, how much money I should make, the type of person I should date, that I should have children by now, own homes, and all the other ‘shoulds’ you can think of!

What should actually does is establishes that there’s a lack, and too often an insurmountable pressure, leading to unmet expectations. You automatically ignore the present. I call it destination obsession.

‘Should’ had become a heavy part of my everyday language until recently.
I came to this awareness through the work I do in therapy, and that opportunity allowed me to examine the expectations that I had.
I have eliminated it from my vocabulary, and I am utilising other words that are gentle and kind to myself, and I have to say, I love it here!

The next time you use that word, I encourage you to pause and then examine your life with kind curiosity as my therapist says, meaning without judgement. You might discover that you love your life exactly the way it is and that you are where you’re meant to be.

Xo

LATEST POSTS

Belief–An Acceptance That Something Exists

I made myself stupid. Hear me out. Years ago, because of an unhealthy level of expectation I placed on myself (which stemmed from comparison), I would harshly judge what I said and how I said it. I would go over every minute detail and pick myself apart mentally, with the underlying message being you’re not …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 10–My Life In Paris

This episode is about my experience of being a Black Brit who moved from London to Paris in a pandemic. I discuss having covid, language barriers and general challenges of integrating into a new society.

by Irene Ephraim

Forgive–To Cancel a Debt.

Nothing is more important than what you choose to do with the breadth of your life. To not forgive is to rob yourself of a life you deserve. …but alas it is you that has been sentenced to a life in prison.  Unforgiveness* is a treacherous con artist because it deceives you into thinking you’re …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

What Are You Looking At? 

A video of Kim K came across my sight over the weekend. It was her on SNL. I watched it and it dawned on me that I have no idea what she and her family were up to these days.  It’s fascinating what can change once you set your eyes on something entirely different.  I regularly …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Loading…

Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.

A Little Joy

03 Thursday Dec 2020

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I cannot remember the last time I decorated my home for Christmas. My family, at least the younger lot, aren’t fussed with Christmas much to my dismay. How and why don’t you love it?!?

Keeping up the Christmas cheer when others around you are not enthusiastic about it, has been challenging and ultimately demotivating. As a result my festive spirit waned over the years. Bah hambug!

This year is different. Maybe it’s because I’m away from home and in a new home, but I decided that given everything that has happened, creating a little joy in our place was necessary.

Saturday was the first day of the non-essential shops reopening, and having spent the last few weeks only going to the supermarket and straight back home, I was itching to get out and do other normal things, albeit with a mask on.

We spent the day deciding on Christmas decor; should we get a white tree? a green one? a snow Christmas tree? tinsel? a Christmas plant? decorative Christmas window stickers? Yes. Yes to everything.

That evening we put the tree together. It looked small and scrawny.
We spent the first few seconds after erecting the tree laughing at how uncharismatic and un-christmas it looked. Um did we make a mistake going for this tree?

Before

A can of fake snow, tinsel, glittery green and gold baubles and LED lights later, we had a semblance of healthy-ish and joyful looking tree. Results! (Still a work in progress)

Christmas Decorations
After

The warm and inviting ambience the lights create as it subtly illuminates the room, gives me instant joy and is a reminder that good and wonderful things exist. I’m glad I didn’t succumb to being the Grinch this year, as 2020 really doesn’t need any help with that!

My point is mark the occasion, no matter how little or who likes it or doesn’t, curate a little joy for yourself.
xo

This is it currently 🙂

LATEST POSTS

Finishing Well

I visited the Musée Yves Saint Laurent on Sunday and was re-energised by what I saw. For the designer, it was more than just clothes that looked good, it was art, curated by passion, breaking moulds and forging new ways to be seen and felt. As I perused his wears, studied the fabrics, observed the …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

September

The feeling of a crisp Monday morning cannot be replicated by any other day of the week. It’s full of both promise and dread in equal amounts. What will it bring? What will I have to tackle? What joy will I experience? What task might feel too great? And whilst you marinate on it, you’ll …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Back to Life, Back to Reality.

And if you’re seeing this post, it’s an indication that at least for today, I won. Whew! Returning to the blog after an unplanned period away, is like that first day at the gym after falling off for months. It takes a whole lot to get there. On this occasion, the distance was due to Covid. …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Question It

Fortuitously, I picked up this book recently to re-read it for the umpteenth time and the words below reflect my sentiments in this post. Much of our education of the world comes from other sources. We seldom form and realise our own ideas about it till much later on in life, if ever at all. …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Loading…

Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.

20 Things to Know In Your 20’s – Part 2 (Reposted)

26 Thursday Nov 2020

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

 

My next post is titled ‘Navigating Your 30’s’ and I thought before I drop that, I’d repost an oldie but goodie from 2017. I wrote this in the days leading up to my 30th birthday, and much has changed, with me that is.

For now, a quick refresh on things to know in your 20’s and at any age for that matter.

“Continuing on from my last post on Sunday, here are the next 10 things I have learnt in my 20’s:

  1. Not everyone’s opinion matters, in fact yours is the most important. And if yours is self-depreciating then you need to remedy that immediately effectively.
  2. Heartbreak hurts like a bitch, but one day you will be better. I was in love with someone for years and I honestly thought my little heart will never mend. It did. Now, I look back and laugh (cackle) at how dramatic that period of my life was. It was also one of the biggest teachers I have ever had.
  3. Don’t be okay with the okey doke. If you believe you can have different, then go for it irrespective of what people say or the environment you are in. Many Greats started at the very bottom.
  4. For my ladies, you can say no to sex if you don’t want to. Men, you don’t have to sleep with a girl, you control your membrane. Society might encourage that behaviour but for us all it is okay to say no, not today. The opposite is also okay too. But do so with caution and sense
  5. Let go. It requires way too much to hold on.
  6. Cut and or reduce communication with those that do not add to your life. Honestly, the power is in your hands. You absolutely have a say in who should be in your life and who shouldn’t. It takes one person to ruin your life, don’t let that happen on your watch
  7. Travel. If it’s your thing and even if it’s not, a few visits to new places won’t hurt you, it’ll enrich your life.
  8. Work on your discipline. To live the life you want will require sacrifice and discipline, otherwise years will go by and nothing in your life would have changed.
  9. Think carefully about what you want your future to look like and start to work on it now.
  10. People will let you down, repeatedly and you’ll do the same to others. Its life, nobody is perfect, don’t beat yourself up about it (I’m working on this as we speak), just do better.

I hope you find some of the 10 tips useful, what are your tips?

Xo”

LATEST POSTS

Face Your Front

Face your front is a commonly known Nigerian expression, meaning to look ahead, pay attention to your affairs and stop watching others. The irony is the exact opposite expression also exists, and its ‘Look at your mates’, but we will unpack that another time. How much further along might you be if you pull backed some …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

It Didn’t Work

It didn’t work. Didn’t it? Or did you give up after the first attempt?  We’ve become accustomed to expecting microwave results. We no longer believe in the art of cultivating, nurturing or giving of ourselves to a thing. We want it, and we want it now.  I often go back to what I was like as a child. …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Endless Excuses

We are full of excuses. Excuses that hinder, inhibit, and can foster stagnation. And yes, sometimes they are valid and substantiated, however, they are only as powerful as we say they are. I often remember what a coach said to me once, after I poured out my heart and laid out my issues regarding overcoming …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Loading…

Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.

The Ground Is Fertile

24 Thursday Sep 2020

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , ,

The ground is fertile.

Everything is moving at lightning speed. And having paid very close attention to the times (yes, with all that is happening), now is the time to sow seeds, and to sprint towards your goals.

All we’ve known is being uprooted, things are shifting quickly, people are realising more and more what’s important, and ultimately change is afoot.

There are no blueprints to follow, because at this moment in history, everyone is figuring it out for themselves. Everyone.
This is the perfect opportunity to do away with the things you’ve always felt obligated to do, and carve out something new, something brilliant, something specially thought of for you, and by you.

Xo

P.s Don’t say I didn’t give you the heads up.

Latest Posts

WDYWM?! Episode 8–Moving On

London to Paris–that’s the move I made during a pandemic. I talk about the good, bad and uncomfortable things about starting a new life somewhere different.

by Irene Ephraim

Lean In

I love knowing everything. I like to know what I’m doing, where I’m doing it, who I’m doing it with (don’t be nasty), and how I’m doing it. I like my t’s crossed and i’s dotted, but that’s not life. Life is full of beautiful, unpredictable, and transformative unknowns and you only get to find …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

One Day You’ll Be Old

One day you will be old. At least I hope to be. As I prepared for bed last night, I took one more glance in the mirror to observe myself, and I had an epiphany; one day I’ll be old and this skin that I’m waiting on to get better, will have lived life and …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

Loading…

Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.

Tenets

08 Tuesday Sep 2020

Posted by in Experiences, Lessons Learnt

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , ,

A little while ago someone asked me for some tips on blogging, and so many thoughts came to mind.

I had much to say; things I regret not doing, things I could have only learnt on the job, things I wish someone had told me, and things that are difference makers.
I gave her my most significant lessons, which in all honesty apply to many things, and I am sharing them with you today.
*record scratch* I had initially typed up the seven points I gave her, but upon reflection, I changed my mind as I really, really, really want you to focus on the important stuff. And now we have three.

  1. No, your idea is not stupid. Run with it. The journey from inception to fruition might be a jog, sprint, or marathon, whatever it may be, just start! It doesn’t matter what it looks like, if there are errors or if it’s not exactly how you envisioned it, put ALL of that aside and start with what you have. And yes, you might be the only one who believes in it, still do it!
  2. The best way to get better is to ‘do’. Do more, and that means practice, practice, practice! Practice precedes progress and improvement. Practice well.
  3. Consistency. This one will make or break what you do. Do not underestimate it at all. Your work and purpose depends on it. It won’t be like that forever, but at the beginning and perhaps for a (very) long time, make consistency your goal. Think of anyone you consider to be successful, were they an overnight success? Absolutely not. It was consistency, trial and error and patience.

The chances are, you know these things already, and if so, I’m reminding you again. There is no escaping these tenets, so you might as well concede, and be on your merry way to hopefully, a more enriched life, doing the thing(s) you have always wanted.

Xo

Latest Posts

WDYWM?! Episode 6–Unravelling

What I thought 2019 would be vs what it is was. I felt like I was dragged through the mud, but there is light at the end of the tunnel, even if you have to fight tooth and nail for it! I share some of the difficulties of life and adulting.

by Irene Ephraim

You vs Society

When I take an unexpected break (which I am now calling a mid-season break), I usually return with an explanation in hand.I’m not doing that today (maybe later), and I hope by the end of this read, you too will choose yourself and your best interests. Society demands that you work incessantly. It’s crammed down …

Continue reading →

by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 5–Flights and Fights

There is so much of the world to see and experience, and what better way to do that than with friends and family, unless…you fight, fall out and break up! I speak on some of my trips, what happened and whether we bounced back, or not.

by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 4–Shipped and Left Behind

We all have events that have changed the course of our lives and who we are today. I share my experience on being uprooted from everything I knew, to start a life at a private boarding school in what was then a foreign country to me.

by Irene Ephraim

Loading…

Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.