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Gratitude

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Can you see the heart shape?

This week has been…*deep exhale*
In any case, we made it. And we mustn’t take it lightly.
Someone, before the end of this sentence has left this realm.
We mustn’t take lightly, the gift we’ve been given.

It was 4am and I couldn’t sleep. No surprise there.
I went downstairs and made a cup of chamomile tea.
Embracing the warmth pulsating through my hands, I took a cautious sip and followed the liquid as it travelled down. The heat inflamed my chest. 
What a beautiful feeling. To be alive. To experience. To feel. To be present.

Write down what you are thankful for, so you can visually see all your riches.
These are some of mine in no particular order.

Thankful to be healthy 
Thankful for my family 
Thankful for my brilliant mind 
Thankful for the wisdom instilled in me 
Thankful for a roof over my head 
Thankful for my partner 
Thankful for my friends 
Thankful for waking up this morning
Thankful that I can cook 
Thankful that I can eat what I choose to eat
Thankful that I can give 
Thankful for my vision 
Thankful for all my senses that work together beautifully 
Thankful for my bed and electric blanket
Thankful for my creativity 
Thankful for this blog
Thankful for the ability to write 
Thankful for the money that I have 
Thankful that I am always provided for 
Thankful for my intuition 
Thankful for discernment
Thankful for music
Thankful that things easily work out for me
Thankful for stillness in the midst of chaos 

With everything shifting and things disintegrating around us, I still have so much to be grateful for. I’m sure you do too. Let’s focus on that, and savour the small, almost indistinguishable moments, as those are the things that affirm our lives.

I wish you all an uplifting, rejuvenating & loving weekend

Xo

LATEST POSTS

Endless Excuses

We are full of excuses. Excuses that hinder, inhibit, and can foster stagnation. And yes, sometimes they are valid and substantiated, however, they are only as powerful as we say they are. I often remember what a coach said to me once, after I poured out my heart and laid out my issues regarding overcoming …

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by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 8–Moving On

London to Paris–that’s the move I made during a pandemic. I talk about the good, bad and uncomfortable things about starting a new life somewhere different.

by Irene Ephraim

Lean In

I love knowing everything. I like to know what I’m doing, where I’m doing it, who I’m doing it with (don’t be nasty), and how I’m doing it. I like my t’s crossed and i’s dotted, but that’s not life. Life is full of beautiful, unpredictable, and transformative unknowns and you only get to find …

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by Irene Ephraim

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Nothing Was The Same

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20/06/2020

Nothing was the same.

Do you know what’s beautiful about this time? None of us have been here before.
And I suppose with nothingness in front of us, there is an opportunity here, to create from scratch.

We can imagine and design something new for ourselves; as brilliant and advanced ways of being, have come from tectonic plate shifting moments in history, such as this.

Conspire with life. Form an alliance that you will do your best, and it will do the same to support you and your endeavours.
The dawn of a new era is upon us, and the ground is fertile.

Are you up for the task?

Xo

LATEST POSTS

One Day You’ll Be Old

One day you will be old. At least I hope to be. As I prepared for bed last night, I took one more glance in the mirror to observe myself, and I had an epiphany; one day I’ll be old and this skin that I’m waiting on to get better, will have lived life and …

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by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 6–Unravelling

What I thought 2019 would be vs what it is was. I felt like I was dragged through the mud, but there is light at the end of the tunnel, even if you have to fight tooth and nail for it! I share some of the difficulties of life and adulting.

by Irene Ephraim

You vs Society

When I take an unexpected break (which I am now calling a mid-season break), I usually return with an explanation in hand.I’m not doing that today (maybe later), and I hope by the end of this read, you too will choose yourself and your best interests. Society demands that you work incessantly. It’s crammed down …

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by Irene Ephraim

WDYWM?! Episode 5–Flights and Fights

There is so much of the world to see and experience, and what better way to do that than with friends and family, unless…you fight, fall out and break up! I speak on some of my trips, what happened and whether we bounced back, or not.

by Irene Ephraim

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A Will, A Way.

10 Tuesday Mar 2020

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life

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61e5e7a5-db4a-413c-90cf-3df76b6e053cI have been willing myself to complete a post for weeks now to no avail. Five different topics with a beginning, a middle and no end. Huff.

As I finished writing that last sentence, a thought came to me to just post one as is, and that’s what I’m going to do.

Too often we let perfectionism block and stop us from showing up, believing that we have to present a completely finished & polished product, and truthfully we don’t. What’s much more revolutionary than that is being your authentic self and simply showing up the best way you know how, rough edges and all.

So here is one I started a month ago and haven’t edited or completed.  And maybe I will, maybe I won’t.

” Remove and Replace

Whatever expectations you’ve had for your life for the last few years or decades, perhaps it’s time you let up and release them.

We can get so caught up in what we think it should be and forcefully try and make things happen, that we actually miss out on the opportunities right in front of us.

That doesn’t mean never getting the things you want, it’s more about adjusting your lens to capture what already exists and making it better.

I was having a conversation with a friend about life and its fragility and because of that, again I thought are can we really afford to get stuck on the things that haven’t worked? to hold grudges? to wallow in self-pity? to allow negativity?  Sure, its easier said than done. And yes it’s something to be practice and there is no time like the present.

So many of us give up on the first try, because we’re so stuck on how we envisioned it happening that we haven’t stopped to consider other options.”

Xo

What 2009-2019 Taught Me.

27 Friday Dec 2019

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Before you receive an onslaught of all the decade stuff, I thought I’d quickly slide mine in there and share some of the things I’ve learnt over the last 10 years.

I started this decade as a 22 year old, who didn’t know shit, still doesn’t, ha! Anyway, without further ado, here they are:

  1. Love can be simple and it can be complicated. It’s also not meant to be an exact replica of others, it should however, be and feel good.
  2. Time doesn’t heal all wounds, working on them/you does.
  3. Forgiveness is essential and not an option. Your health, relationships and life need it.
  4. It’s okay. Whatever it is, it’s okay.
  5. Take risks, especially the ones that make you want to vomit. You either love it or you’ll learn from it.
  6. Make your own rules. You’re the boss of your life.
  7. Speak up. Clear your throat, take a deep breath and say it. Not saying it, is costly.
  8. One size does not fit all. Your life is meant to be colourful and full of character (including characters). You’re breathing, so let it do it’s thing and go with the flow where you can.
  9. Let it all go. People, jobs, ideals.  Free yourself and be better.
  10. Give. To yourself first, then to others. That way you’ll always be at your best.
  11. There are upsides to every downside, there are downsides to every upside, and to experience anything good you have to embrace all of it

Bonus: We’re all just figuring it out. The above is what I’ve figured out so far and truthfully in the next year/decade it will change. That’s life.

What are some of the things you have learnt over the last decade?

xo

P.s If I don’t write to you before the new year, have a wonderful New Year! xo

One At A Time

19 Tuesday Nov 2019

Posted by in Dreams

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facetune_18-11-2019-18-17-01-1

 

I really hope this post meets you well.

Can you believe we’re nearly at the end of the year? AND we’re about to enter into a new decade? Wild.

2019 so far for myself and a lot of others, has been a roller coaster of emotions and experiences that we never expected. Things like, unemployment, unplanned pregnancies, incarceration, losing friendships, losing loved ones to death, to name a few things- like I said, a roller coaster.  

I wonder if there is some sort of universal purge happening because we are entering into a new decade? What do you think?

Notwithstanding the party and bullsh*t that life can be, we still have to participate and how we do this, is entirely up to us.

Sure, we’re not in control of a lot of things, but the one of the things we can master is, ourselves. WE are huge contributors to our experiences.

With that said, I want you to think about ONE thing you want to accomplish before the 31st December 2019.

Just one. One, because when we attempt to juggle multiple things at a time the following occurs; very little gets done, you become overwhelmed with how much there is to do, causes frustration and worse than all of that, can make you stagnant.

Once you have decided what that is, close off or shut down anything that does not support the thing you are in the process of accomplishing. That might mean limiting the access others have to you, setting a timetable, changing your environment, exposing yourself to something different and so on.

Chances are, you already know what you have to do, you just don’t want to do it. Take heed to whatever messages you are receiving right now about your life, as its the very thing that will get you closer to where you want to be.

And if you don’t? Well you already know what life will look like because you are living it now. Do yourself one solid before the new year and surprise yourself.

With love, Irene x 

 

Personal Enemy No 1…You.

28 Monday Jan 2019

Posted by in Dreams, Life, Manifest, More Action

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2b3d7b53-13f3-497a-88cd-a354a481c8f9-1

Self-sabotage. What a bitch.

We’ve all done/do it and probably have experienced how difficult it is to unearth the habits that cause you to trip up and repeat stifling behaviours. Truthfully, it’s a scary thing to change your ways, as doing so requires you to push past who you currently are to be someone you have very little experience being.

It’s much much easier to remain as you are…yet you still feel so uncomfortable. Your desires niggle at you, willing you to get out of your comfort zone and do the work necessary to make your dreams materialise, but you’re scared shitless and feel like an imposter, ‘Who am I to have such audacious desires?’.

You might even make attempts to do the work, but you’re suddenly distracted, matter of fact you’re always “distracted”. You’ve become adept at finding excuses to not really show up, ‘It won’t work because so and so’. You want to leave it, you even convince yourself that you’re content to, but again, your dreams are persistent and won’t let you rest, it simply won’t allow you to just move on.

I get it. Changing is hard and real long lasting change takes time, effort and most importantly patience.

I do believe there’s a time and place for radical action but this is not one of them. Here requires a delicate approach. Below are 3 tips to help you help yourself.

1. Recognise the habits and thought patterns that keep you stagnant. One of mine is ‘There’s no point, I won’t get it.’ And guess what? It’s self-fulfilling, because automatically I won’t do the things required to get it. Side note: I had an interview today and got outside the building, only to come up with reasons why I didn’t want to go in. Thankfully, I had enough sense to call a friend who gave me something to think about. I went. I just needed a little push.

2. Pick one thing to alter and take a step towards it. I recently did a 24 hour ‘be positive’ challenge and I realised that as “positive” as I considered myself to be, I had A LOT of negative chatter going on subconsciously (lots more work to do).

3. Do the thing your gut has been begging you to do. It’s your biggest cheerleader. Refrain from constantly looking outside of yourself for affirmation. I truly believe that deep down every individual knows what’s best for them, they simply don’t trust themselves enough.

Take a chance on yourself, what is the worst that could happen? Growth- and that’s whether you succeed or don’t.

Xo

I Chose This Life

21 Monday Jan 2019

Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life, Motivation, Thoughts in motion

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Winter FabA few years ago I was knocking on doors, trying to find the person who owned the car that had scratched mine. One person opened their door and instead of paying attention to what he was saying, I was peering into his home as I couldn’t help but notice how different it was.

It didn’t look like mine, even though we lived a street away. It was not designed in the way these homes were originally made. It had been gutted out and designed specifically to the owners wants.

It surprised me and I thought to myself ‘So we don’t all live the same?’. Now I know that might sound obvious, but think about it. If you lived in well known expensive town, you might think that the inhabitants are generally well to do.

It was significant to me because we often think that because an experience is shared by a group of people that everyone must be having the same experiences, and it is not so.

You wake up and hate going to work, someone else loves it.

You dislike the treatment you receive in this relationship by this wo/man, someone else is deeply in love and enjoying their partner.

You barely make enough to get by, someone else is making more in a month than you make in a year.

Your friendship group is lack lustre, someone else has a great group of friends and loves their life.

The difference in the above is about creating, creating by choice. We all live through and by the choices we make every single day.

You can live how you want to if only you will consistently make choices that align with the thing that you want.

Do not underestimate the power of your choices as they determine what you experience daily. Just take a look around you and examine what is taking place, what choices did you make? Don’t like it? Choose differently.

Xo

Can You Focus On…Me?

17 Thursday Jan 2019

Posted by in Motivation, Thoughts in motion

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img_8202It’s the 17th January (already?!) and dare I ask, how is it going?

For some of the people I know it’s been, a bit, bluregh. And a bit bluregh is never a good way to feel. Maybe it’s the January blues or in London the gloomy weather? Whatever it is, as with most things, it’ll soon pass.

On my side it’s been quite slow, which I welcome because I know it’s not going to be like this for much longer.

As tradition dictates, with a new year comes new or refreshed goals. I have some that this time around I’m choosing to keep to myself however, I do have one that above all of them is absolutely necessary in order to meet my goals and that is to focus.

I used to hear as a child that ‘Irene is great and has potential but she lacks focus’, and now as an adult I understand more what they meant by that. I struggle to give a thing my undivided attention, so I’m gifting myself myself and working on improving my focus, little by little.

What are you working on?

My advice for any goals or desires you have is to take each day as it comes. Let things happen organically. I spent a considerable amount of time in the past forcing things to happen and the outcome always left me wanting.

To summarise, work with what works.

Xo

P.s Things will start look up, I promise 🙂

Lone Ranger

30 Sunday Dec 2018

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facetune_26-12-2018-22-06-16-1My siblings and I were talking about favourites with our parents and we joked that I was the black sheep as I didn’t have a parent that I favoured.

That statement didn’t surprise me at all. I seldom did things the way others did and this made me stand out like a sore thumb. 

For the most part being this way is fine, but sometimes you want to be a part of the crowd and blend in because, well, it’s easier. There’s less conversation and strife…however there’s a price, what and who will you become by doing that? I’ve tried it a few times in the past to get on board and do things the way others did. It rarely worked and I often felt stupid afterwards. 

I consider how different my life is to many of my peers and the amount of times I have wished and attempted to be in their position just so I don’t get left behind. I laugh now as it was never my business to do or live as they do, and in any case I failed terribly at it. Through these experiences I concluded I actually know what’s best for me and should trust myself more.

So for the lone rangers who tread off the beaten track, please continue. There is a reason why you go through those things, there’s a reason why you face those particular challenges, there’s a reason why you’re the topic of conversation, there’s a reason why you do things the way you do and that reason is tied to your purpose. 

It might not be clear to you what it is, you might even want to give up and be like others, don’t. You have come too far to let up now. 

With the New Year around the corner, recommit to yourself, appreciate what you’ve accomplished and who have become. Trust yourself more, even if a decision ends up different to how you envisioned, believe that it will work out for your good.

Block out the noise from others on what they think you should be doing, think for yourself, believe in your path, especially if there is no one around you doing it, you never know who needs who you are and what you have. 

Xo 

Am I Qualified?

29 Monday Oct 2018

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facetune_29-10-2018-17-17-37-1.jpgEver had a new goal that you were super excited about?

You’re filled with the possibilities of what achieving this goal will do for you and you cannot wait to get started.

You plan and establish the actions you need to take and then unexpectedly your insecurities surface.

What if I’m not qualified?

Who said I am qualified?

What if someone thinks I’m not up for the job?

Doubts here and before you know it, it starts to feel like a pipe dream. Within moments, you have convinced yourself that you’re definitely not up for the job and resign that goal to the ‘do not attempt’ pile.

Why are we the very first to sap the life out of something? Our own worst enemy.

Do you know what qualifies those that do vs those that do not? Their belief. That’s it. Those that achieve the most, do not allow their past, failures or circumstances to dictate what they can and cannot do. In spite of it, they move full steam ahead.

You will always be better off for doing something even when it does not work out as envisioned. The trade-off is the wealth of experience, applied knowledge and skills gained, that not doing anything could never provide you with. It is also a stepping stone.

I bumped into someone I knew online through a mutual friend. I had not met them in person until this morning. We started talking about various things and he asked me whether an online series I was a part of was well thought out or improvised. What do you think I said? We winged that bad boy!

None of us really knew what we were doing, we just showed up and figured it out as we went along. In that same year of doing the series, I wrote, directed and produced my first short play. I won 2 awards for the play and a little bulb went off in my head ‘I’m a writer’, and always had been, but it wasn’t until that point, did I acknowledge myself. That was almost six years ago.

Do you think how I write now is how I have always written? Absolutely not! In the beginning, it was trash. I cringe every time I see something from the past, but I had to start somewhere, as terrible as it was.

So trust me when I say, you can do this. Little by little, step by step, piece by piece.

Xo