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lipstickandblackcoffee

~ To A Life Worth Living xo

lipstickandblackcoffee

Tag Archives: children

WDYWM?! Episode 9–Adulting: A Sham & A Scam

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Posted by Irene Ephraim in WDYWM Podcast

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Adulthood, Bills, Childhood, children, Expenses, Marriage, Money, Reality

Adulting, need I say more? If you could opt out, at least for a period of time, would you take it? This episode is about the realities of adulthood.

Make Believe

15 Monday Oct 2018

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Experiences, Life, More Action

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belief, children, Create, imagination, inspiration, Law of Attraction, life, Make Believe, Manifestation, Monday, Radio, TV

Welcome to class folks. Today’s assignment is to make believe again. 

As kids we were encouraged to write stories, be creative and imagine, fast forward to being adults its “be serious, stop fooling around, you’re not a kid anymore”. Huh? How? Why?

Make believe is in my opinion a very necessary part of creating life itself. Everything we see was once a part of someone’s imagination.

I think about planes flying, watching images on TV or listening to sound on the radio and it blows my mind. These were things once unseen and unheard of, which have now become a part of our everyday life. I want us to get back to that, that space of make believe first before anything else.

And we can do this from where we are and at any time. You can imagine whatever you like, whether it exists or not, and then write it down and make it plain, even if it is only to be witnessed by you. Look past your current circumstances and freely create. Once you have, let it go. Yup, you heard me, let it go, forget about it, put it somewhere you won’t necessarily come across it every day.

Yes I know it sounds a little batty but humour me, and on Wednesday I’ll go into further details and give you my personal manifestation system (I sound like a wizard, I’m not, but it works).

Speak to you then xo

 

New Week: Press Reset

13 Monday Nov 2017

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Dreams, Experiences, More Action, Motivation, Motivational & Intentional

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Accomplish, believe, challenge, Child Like, children, dreams, Goals, Learn, Let Go, lifestyle, Monday, New week, Resolutions, Speaker, success

Who taught you to stop believing?

Do you remember being a child and believing in the impossible? Nothing was off limits. I can recall countless times where whatever I thought of or believed in happened. I’m not going to share what some of them were, because I am certain someone will want to cart me off to the head doctor.

I spent so much of my childhood especially being the only child for almost 10 years (and at that point you’re still an only child because of the age gap), living in my imagination. I would conjure up stories, desires and situations which made my young life that much richer. Life, however, has other plans and slowly all the negative things get the better of us and we soon forget how to manifest and live more.  But I want to get back there, living as a child does, with no doubts, little fear and great ambition.

I asked myself this question, ‘how do we not become bogged down with the negative things that have happened, to cause us to believe less?’ The answer I received is this, learn and let go.

Think about it, a lot of children when they hurt themselves or don’t succeed at doing something, they get right back up and do it again. A child learning to walk after falling down a few times doesn’t suddenly say ‘yeah this walking stuff isn’t for me’, they carry on trying until they get it. The recollection of how badly it went wrong the first time is but a distance memory to them; they learn and they move on.

steps

One of the ways we can implement this ability is by following this principle by the good book, where it says but transformed by the renewing of your mind. One interpretation of this that you have to constantly, daily even, press reset.

With this in mind, I have decided to push myself beyond my self-inflicted limitations and I would love for you to join me.

Pick one thing that you have found to be a challenge to accomplish. It could be going to the gym 4 times a week, finishing off a proposal, having that business meeting, registering your company, making that dreaded phone call to a family member that you have not spoken to in years, buying a house, it could be absolutely anything. Decide that by the end of the week (19.11.17), you would have either done it or are one step closer to doing it. The one step does have has to be a huge step (no pressure 🙂 ).

My challenge has dragged on for many years, but I am determined to pull my finger out! I’ll definitely share mine next Monday, eek!

In the water

I’ll leave with this which I wholly believe in, it is always better to have tried something than to not have tried at all. You learn so much quicker when you do than when you don’t.

See you on the flipside!

Xo

Write Your Own Autobiography

28 Thursday May 2015

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Dreams, Life

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author, autobiography, children, creative, imagination, inspire, JK Rowling, story, wikipedia, words, write

On Tuesday this week, I was speaking to a friend over the phone and I jokingly said ‘create a Wikipedia page on me, I’ll tell you what to write’ who says that?! (I do lol). He responded ‘Why don’t you just do one yourself? Anyone can do one’ errh because it’s corny! Who creates their OWN Wikipedia page, that’s like creating your own Instagram fan page, yet you have no following, LOSER! Or are they?

I was up uber early this morning, and I came across an article on Jessica Alba’s success and off the cuff (whilst sharing it with a friend), I thought this is how I want an article/(auto)biography of me to look like, and began writing one in text form to my friend. Words cannot articulate well enough how doing that exercise made me feel. I went from not wanting to get up from bed, to being successful and well accomplished. There wasn’t a fibre in my body that didn’t believe it to be true (or that it will be). My attitude and perspective instantly transformed.

As a child, you are told to use your imagination and be as creative as you like. As you grow older you are taught the opposite-the irony. It suddenly becomes ‘irresponsible’ to be that way and you have to ‘grow up’.

Here’s something to think about, anyone who has ever created something valuable or lived the life they dreamed of, was once seen as ridiculous to one person or many. Their imagination and outlandish behaviour pushed them towards creating masterpieces. Think of one person you admire, and read their story, every single one has encountered a unique set of challenges and thrived notwithstanding. Take JK Rowling for example, divorcee, single mum, on welfare, from the onset, society would dictate that the odds are heavily stacked against her, in spite of this, Harry Potter was born. Need I say more?

I implore you this morning to be as ludicrous as you like with what you want, create the life you want to live, on your terms and start by writing YOUR OWN AUTO/BIOGRAPHY. It is a powerful activity and as we know, thoughts become things, and words are like springs, once spoken, they are called into action.

Now I don’t know if I’m going to run along and create a Wikipedia page (although if you fancy the job, drop me a message-just kidding!) what I will re-emphasise is to write your story how you want it be and see what it does for you. Don’t be dictated to by society’s measures, you cannot break the mould by succumbing to its wills.

I’ll share a bit of what I wrote to my friend this morning, if you laugh (grrrr), actually I don’t care if you do :).

“Fiercely independent and determined, she sought the best out of life and would stop at nothing to get it, a quality bestowed upon her by her mother. Giving up was never an option. As a graduate she faced many adversities and this incited the desire to inspire others like her, to do and be better. With her experience and wisdom, she wrote her first book. It has sold over 1 million copies internationally, been translated in over 15 languages and is still a best seller 3 years after its release. A wife, mother, business tycoon, entrepreneur, motivational speaker, author and performer, Irene believes there isn’t anything that is unattainable. With all her accomplishments, it begs the question how does she do it all?”

Like they say if your dreams don’t frighten you, then they aren’t big enough!  My friends response to my text this morning ‘Oh Irene, you’re like a big kid’ I guess that means I’m on the right track 😉 .

Age aint nothing but a number!

08 Wednesday Oct 2014

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Life, Relationships

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children, happiness, Love, Marriage, Time

Age ain’t nothing but a number!

People are making themselves emotionally and physically sick over these life robbing unwritten rules as to the way their life is suppose to be.

I write on this occasion for my ladies that are constantly being hit with “When are you going to get married and have kids?…” -_-. You are getting it from your family members, your friends, your colleagues, strangers and on top of all that seeing pictures day in, day out of others doing those things. You are bound to start feeling anxious and that you are falling far behind.

When you allow yourself to be managed and controlled by other people’s ideologies as to how they think your life should be, you will NEVER be happy. These same said people won’t be there when you’ve rushed yourself into an unhealthy relationship or stay up late with you to take care of your child/ren.

Allowing such pressures to affect how you live your life can cause you to make indelible choices that are hard to recover from.

Personally, I wish people would be quiet about these “statistics” of women’s infertility the older they get or the higher risk of down syndrome as if people that had kids young were completely exempt from such things…yeah I didn’t think so. Oh and the other one is the lack of “good” quality men out there. There are hundreds, thousands, millions of men you haven’t met but Sue wants you to be worried about it because Sue has never encountered a good man which is purely down to her terrible choices in them (You attract what you are).

If we want to talk about statistics let’s talk about the women that have perfectly healthy kids and are over forty? Or the woman that got married to the love of her life in her late 30’s? Shouldn’t this be considered too or nah? There is no singular rule book on how things are to be.

Having previously subjected myself to such thoughts I know how depressing it can begin to feel. I almost allowed it to end a good situation by saying “ I don’t have time to be with someone that doesn’t want to be married and have kids in the next couple years blah blah blah”  Laugh. Out. Loud. All because I succumbed to societies notions of where I should be in life. Truth be told I am not ready for all that!

It is not the end of the world if you don’t have these things by a certain age. As it is your life, I think it’s only fair that it should be governed by your rules.

So the next time someone says “When are you getting married?” or “When are you having kids?” here are a few retorts for you to use.

“I am getting married or having kids…

  1. When YOUR partner starts treating you better
  2. When YOUR kids are doing well in school
  3. When YOU leave the job you’ve been in for 5 years that you hate
  4. When YOU complete your degree that you put on hold for two years
  5. When YOUR finances are in order and you pay your bills on time and are not in thousands of debt
  6. In short I will get married and have kids when all of your life is in complete order.”

You see it’s not cute to make comments about something that is clearly none of your business, LOL. Everybody has something to work and improve upon so it would better if everybody just minded their own business.

In all honesty nobody is qualified to tell you how to live your life. What I write is to inspire, incite and encourage a different thought process and ultimately action, however it is entirely up to you how you choose to live your life because at the end of the day it IS your life-your responsibility, your choice-your consequences.

Signed LBC

See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil.

24 Thursday Jul 2014

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Life, More Action, Self-Development

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care, children, death, difference maker, happiness, humanity, life, Love, man, Nelson Mandela, passion, peace, people, share, suffering, voice, war, woman

See no evil, hear no evil and speak no evil.

I made a decision before I started blogging that I would not deviate much from my objective but in this case, I think it is necessary.

I would be the first person to admit that over the past few months, I have actively chosen to ignore the recent happenings in the world, not because I don’t care but because I care too much. It is heart wrenching to watch the terrible happenings over and over and over again without the immediate ability to affect the situation.

If you’ve read my previous posts you’ll know I am strong believer in monitoring what you pay attention to and what you feed your eyes and ears with, as it has the power to shape your life- And with this I showed apathy to these situations.

However, I am at a point where it is no longer acceptable to be voiceless.

It seems that it is only when things of this magnitude happen that we believe in humanity and fight for its preservation. Orchestrating protests and rally’s, making grand statements on our social networks in order to evoke action from our government or others, whilst ignoring our neighbour that has little to eat, being impetuous with our fellow citizens and making a mockery of human life by spewing out hate through our actions or lack thereof…I hope it’s clear where I am going with this.

If it is change you really want to see, start with what is on your doorstep. Now by no means am I saying don’t make a stand for those suffering in other parts of the world, but what I am trying to reiterate is to also make a difference where it will surely count, in your homes, in your communities and in the lives of those you come into contact with.

I sometimes forget that it requires only one person to command change in any environment, just look at Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Bush, Nelson Mandela, and Hitler. They were all forces in the own right, that commanded the attention and action of others and the world at large. Granted, some of these people abused their power but it does not negate the effect that they had on thousands and millions of people. Why can’t it be you for the better?

Let it not be until we hear about that old man at number 46 who died in his home alone without love or care before we feel impassioned for those in close proximity. Every little action counts, you never know how a small conversation with a beggar may inspire them to do better for themselves or the disadvantaged person you assisted in crossing the road, who has now decided against suicide because you showed them kindness.

I remember a few weeks back (and I share this only for the benefit of this topic as personally, I believe such things should be done in silence) a friend and I walked past this pub and there was a lady crying her eyes out just on the corner. I am certain that a number of people had walked past her already. We decided to stop and ask her what was wrong and she proceeded to tell us the dire circumstances of her friend that was in hospital, who happened to be my age. That saddened me. We did what we were led to and bid her farewell and well wishes. Now I may never see this person again but I hope that in that moment, it provided her with some relief to know that she was not completely alone and that someone cared.

Love, kindness, empathy…always

Signed LBC

Ps. Look look look!  Short post. Oh and I know this is lame but evil backwards is live so erm yeah. That has no bearing on anything :s so seeyoubye!

Why Didn’t You Warn Me?!

Why Didn't You Warn Me?!

Why Didn't You Warn Me?! is a podcast speaking on the things you should know, but don't. The things you typically find out after the fact, and it's sometimes too late. Fear not, Why Didn't You Warn Me?! with Irene aka Lipstick, will give you the 411 through story-telling, conversations, and refreshing perspectives.

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