Tag Archives: inspire

Lemonade

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Posted by in Life, More Action, Thoughts in motion

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I am probably going to tell this fable all wrong and add and subtract bits, but you’ll get the gist. My counsellor told me a story about a multimillionaire and it goes like this.

He had a pool in his house filled with alligators and he said that whoever can swim the length of this pool and make it out will be given half of his wealth.  Of course, the rich man did not believe anyone could make it through. The next minute, all you could hear and see is a man who was thrashing and flailing his arms around like a mad man in the pool. He miraculously made it out on the other side, unscathed.

The crowd was applauding and cheering.  He was now the heir to half of the rich man’s wealth and his first words after gathering himself together were “Who pushed me?”

When I was told this story, I laughed so hard. I was having a miserable day and hearing it, thoroughly cheered me up because I could certainly relate.

We’ve all been in a situation where we have been thrashing and flailing our arms for dear life and somehow we survived. We probably didn’t think we would, but we were trying anyway because we had no choice. These moments are what I call lemons.

Sometimes its life’s way of showing you that you have become complacent and that thing that you want is NOT going to come to you if you carry on as you are, so it thrusts you forward and lemons appear everywhere, it’s time for you to thrash and flail. Do not despise this phase of your life, instead see this as your opportunity to grow, learn and once on the other side, thrive and drink lemonade.

Xo

Complaining gets you results!

06 Monday Jun 2016

Posted by in Dreams, Life, Thoughts in motion

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I have a confession to make. For the past three weeks I have been a champion complainer. Almost every single morning, I have bitched and moaned about this ‘thing’. What is the ‘thing’? Working, but more specifically the commute to work.

After not having a job for 5 months by choice, going back to work (also by choice, well more so necessity) has tested my entire existence. There were days where I woke up and thought, this is the day, this is the day, I am going to run into oncoming traffic and end it all.

Okay okay, that was a bit dramatic, but it would be dishonest to pretend that everything is all rosy when you bliming well know it’s not.

My first thought was I am being punished, this HAS to be the reason why all these ill-fated scenarios keep occurring. Alright, maybe punish is the wrong word, teaching me lesson.

The lesson being, do what you’re supposed to do, when you’re supposed to do it, otherwise you’d end up doing what you don’t want to do-like me ggrrrr.

In a weird turn of events, it’s placed the fire back up my butt to get out there and do more to get to where I want to be, a catalyst even.

I write this to stress that as much as your life may not reflect what you want, it is up to YOU to transform things around. I can whinge until I am purple in the face, if I don’t adjust what I do, then that is where I will remain. I guess that is what pains me the most, because I know wherever I am in life, was and is to a large degree, my doing.

It boils down to this, if you don’t like something, change it, if you want something, go for it, if you believe in something, act like it.

I’ll never forget when I had written a long message to my virtual mentor about doing something I had been afraid to do and all she wrote back was just do it. I remember being incredibly irritated by the response yet it was fact. You just have to do it, change it, remove it, test it, try it, it’s all in the action baby! (Said in a strong NY accent, a British one would just sound weird).

XO

What have you done for me lately? 

26 Monday Oct 2015

Posted by in Dreams, Life, More Action

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We always want more yet some of us have done so little with what we have. Ok let me speak for myself, I always want more, better even, but have I made great use of my current resources? Truth be told, no.
Each person has a unique set of skills, resources and ability. They may vary in degrees of expertise, or quality but they are nonetheless existent and purposeful. How purposeful? Well…that depends on you.

It’s Monday, so why not start with a fresh mind and a new direction? Write a list of all the things you have, be it a talent, skill, resource, material item, it could be anything and next to that item, state its use. The idea is to become more aware of what you have in your immediate possession. It will also help you to realise what you are not utilising well enough.

I’ll give you a few of mine that are on my list:

  1. Own vehicle (I value my independence greatly). I am able to move freely from place to place, at my own leisure, meaning I can make appointments, arrive to work on time(erm yeah), meet friends, travel up and down the country (I drove to Wales a couple months back), the list is endless.
  2. It allows me to develop my skills further, interact and build relationships with people that I may not encounter on a day to day basis. I makes moniessssssss, I mean I am paid for my services, which consequently affords me the standard of living that I have and the opportunity to develop myself further in other areas of life.
  1. Social media accounts (that I don’t use nearly as much as I should, ugh)-I can connect and reach people all over the world, I learn a lot about the issues that affect people nationally and internationally. I am also inspired and encouraged by the stories and lives of the people that I come across. People also get to see what I am about and my interests which is (currently) posing for the gram-just kidding!
  1. I am keen learner and can easily adapt to any environment. There’s little to nothing that I won’t make an attempt at doing, no matter how difficult, it’s always worth a try. It means that there’s a lot I am able to do.
  1. Healthy body (sort of, I need a six pack, help! I can’t stop stuffing my face) and a ‘sound’ mind.  I am able to function independently; I can get up and go. Whatever I set my mind to do, I can do. I have conditioned my mind to focus on the positive so I never stay down for long-thankfully (Once upon a time, I could be depressed for days/weeks/months on end).
  1. Ability to create, write, inspire, cultivate.
  1. Creative
  1. An analytical mind. I can piece things together quite quickly and find solutions.
  1. A good sense of style. Perception accounts for a lot

You may have a completely different set of ideals, and the above are just a few of mine. After writing down your list, intentionally decide on what you will use more, or maybe differently. Have it down as an action plan for the week, and let’s see what you come up with.

Till next time, have a great week!

‘I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was baller’

19 Monday Oct 2015

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I’m usually inspired by the people I meet and the conversations that I have. This particular dialogue is one that I have had with myself a lot. It’s the ‘I wish I could have’ one. My friend was talking about how he wishes he was a certain age again and what he would do differently-haven’t we all been there? Wishing we could go back in time and have that passion, that opportunity, that loved one, that money, but the truth is, we can’t go back, so what’s the point? Why hang onto ‘what used to be’ instead of relishing ‘what is and can be’.

Whenever that subject matter comes to mind, I actively think “stop holding onto the past, let it go, move on and be better”. Yes, you may not have the same drive, that chance or that relationship any more but what you do have is this moment right now. This moment to make things how you would want it to be, so that in a few years time, you can be happy and proud of the choices you’ve made and the way you have lived your life.

I have a friend I call ‘Mrs good times’ because she’s fond of looking back and saying those were good times yet I always say to her ‘but you didn’t think so at the time’. We are all guilty of doing that, wanting to rush into the next phase of our lives because the one we have right now just isn’t good enough and for many of us, it never will be. Our perception and consequently our attitude will determine how we feel about ourselves, and ultimately what we do.

2012 was an incredibly trying year for me. I was unemployed for most of it, to say that I was depressed would be using the word lightly. I had bills to take care of that superseded the amount of money I had at any given time.  I was working practically for free under duress; otherwise the meagre remuneration I was paid every two weeks would get cut off. After enduring a particularly difficult time, on my 25th birthday that year (which is mid December) I spent it crying my eyes out and I hate crying! I had well and truly reached my breaking point. Things eventually did get better. When I reflect on that period, there is one thing I had failed to realise, I did not appreciate the amount of time I had to myself.

My very first post on this blog was inspired by that season titled “Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that is the stuff life is made of” a quote by Benjamin Franklin. I actually wrote that piece for a writing competition and decided to use it as my very first introduction to this blog site. I was completely blinded by my need to be self sufficient and pursue my aspirations that I could not see that the copious amount of time I had, could have been converted into creating work that required no one but me and my commitment. I started writing a novel in 2011 that I barely looked at in 2012. I was fixated on earning money, and seeking out others to give me an opportunity when there was one that I had in my hand. It was only after I began working again did I acknowledge the gem that I had been given.

Sometimes we go through things that we don’t fully understand all aspects of or value until much after the fact.

My rationale is this, no matter where you are at this present time, find the gift in it. Good or bad, there is always something to learn, develop and use to your greater advantage.

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.”-Buddha

 

‘As a man thinketh, so is he’

12 Monday Oct 2015

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Listen to the audio version here:https://soundcloud.com/lipstickandblackcoffee/no-30

Why can’t it be me?

In one of my rare moments of reading the newspaper purely to feast my eyes on the luxurious properties, I came across a piece on the ‘Design duo Jay Osgerby and Edward Barber’. They created the 2012 Olympic torch and I thought, what an amazing opportunity, which no doubt would go down in the history books. Following on from last week’s post, I had a thought, why couldn’t that be me or you?

Very often, we wistfully admire others and their accomplishments without realising that we also could be achieving similar things, if only we would accept that it is possible.

It’s almost as if we resign great achievements and fulfilment to the ‘chosen ones’ rather than it is those who chose themselves as worthy.

Today I would like you to think of this, life is a constant rotation of trade by barter. You get something in return for what you give, you give nothing, you get nothing. Make efforts towards what you’ve always dreamt of.

Everything we see, use and live by was once a figment of someone’s imagination. Look around you, your TV, laptop, phone, house, car, was once a foolish idea. Your aspiration might be to be debt free, or to go on holiday with your family or to change careers, whatever it is, no matter how small or grandiose your ambition is, accept first, that it is possible.

The world is made up of so called impossibilities, let that fuel your fire.

Three valuable things to note that will help you:

1) You must surround yourself with people who are in line with your belief.

2) Saturate your life with the things that you believe or wanting to believe via books, videos, the conversations you have, pictures, visiting locations whatever supports your idea, cling to it.

3) Again, you must accept that it is possible and you are already half way there. Reject anything that opposes this idea. Keep your vision at the forefront of your mind, and do something every day that adds to your belief.

I reiterate the importance of your belief above because it governs what you do and how you live your life. The most important one of all that I haven’t mentioned is to believe in yourself, as it is a pre-requisite for embarking on any journey.

We attach so much of our self worth to things, money, individuals and the danger with that, is if that thing is destroyed, or someone says something harmful, or our bank balance is negative, it becomes an instant validation of who we are and it is not so. Value yourself, your worth is not and should not be determined by an inanimate object or someone else.  Their inability to not see your worth is their issue and not one you should take on.

I’ll end with this, believe in yourself, begin where you are, use what you have and finally do not mock small beginnings.

Write your own auto/biography

28 Thursday May 2015

Posted by in Dreams

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On Tuesday this week, I was speaking to a friend over the phone and I jokingly said ‘create a Wikipedia page on me, I’ll tell you what to write’ who says that?! (I do lol). He responded ‘Why don’t you just do one yourself? Anyone can do one’ errh because it’s corny! Who creates their OWN Wikipedia page, that’s like creating your own Instagram fan page, yet you have no following, LOSER! Or are they?

I was up uber early this morning, and I came across an article on Jessica Alba’s success and off the cuff (whilst sharing it with a friend), I thought this is how I want an article/(auto)biography of me to look like, and began writing one in text form to my friend. Words cannot articulate well enough how doing that exercise made me feel. I went from not wanting to get up from bed, to being successful and well accomplished. There wasn’t a fibre in my body that didn’t believe it to be true (or that it will be). My attitude and perspective instantly transformed.

As a child, you are told to use your imagination and be as creative as you like. As you grow older you are taught the opposite-the irony. It suddenly becomes ‘irresponsible’ to be that way and you have to ‘grow up’.

Here’s something to think about, anyone who has ever created something valuable or lived the life they dreamed of, was once seen as ridiculous to one person or many. Their imagination and outlandish behaviour pushed them towards creating masterpieces. Think of one person you admire, and read their story, every single one has encountered a unique set of challenges and thrived notwithstanding. Take JK Rowling for example, divorcee, single mum, on welfare, from the onset, society would dictate that the odds are heavily stacked against her, in spite of this, Harry Potter was born. Need I say more?

I implore you this morning to be as ludicrous as you like with what you want, create the life you want to live, on your terms and start by writing YOUR OWN AUTO/BIOGRAPHY. It is a powerful activity and as we know, thoughts become things, and words are like springs, once spoken, they are called into action.

Now I don’t know if I’m going to run along and create a Wikipedia page (although if you fancy the job, drop me a message-just kidding!) what I will re-emphasise is to write your story how you want it be and see what it does for you. Don’t be dictated to by society’s measures, you cannot break the mould by succumbing to its wills.

I’ll share a bit of what I wrote to my friend this morning, if you laugh (grrrr), actually I don’t care if you do :).

“Fiercely independent and determined, she sought the best out of life and would stop at nothing to get it, a quality bestowed upon her by her mother. Giving up was never an option. As a graduate she faced many adversities and this incited the desire to inspire others like her, to do and be better. With her experience and wisdom, she wrote her first book. It has sold over 1 million copies internationally, been translated in over 15 languages and is still a best seller 3 years after its release. A wife, mother, business tycoon, entrepreneur, motivational speaker, author and performer, Irene believes there isn’t anything that is unattainable. With all her accomplishments, it begs the question how does she do it all?”

Like they say if your dreams don’t frighten you, then they aren’t big enough!  My friends response to my text this morning ‘Oh Irene, you’re like a big kid’ I guess that means I’m on the right track 😉 .