Tag Archives: Job

I Chose This Life

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Posted by in Lessons Learnt, Life, Motivation, Thoughts in motion

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Winter FabA few years ago I was knocking on doors, trying to find the person who owned the car that had scratched mine. One person opened their door and instead of paying attention to what he was saying, I was peering into his home as I couldn’t help but notice how different it was.

It didn’t look like mine, even though we lived a street away. It was not designed in the way these homes were originally made. It had been gutted out and designed specifically to the owners wants.

It surprised me and I thought to myself ‘So we don’t all live the same?’. Now I know that might sound obvious, but think about it. If you lived in well known expensive town, you might think that the inhabitants are generally well to do.

It was significant to me because we often think that because an experience is shared by a group of people that everyone must be having the same experiences, and it is not so.

You wake up and hate going to work, someone else loves it.

You dislike the treatment you receive in this relationship by this wo/man, someone else is deeply in love and enjoying their partner.

You barely make enough to get by, someone else is making more in a month than you make in a year.

Your friendship group is lack lustre, someone else has a great group of friends and loves their life.

The difference in the above is about creating, creating by choice. We all live through and by the choices we make every single day.

You can live how you want to if only you will consistently make choices that align with the thing that you want.

Do not underestimate the power of your choices as they determine what you experience daily. Just take a look around you and examine what is taking place, what choices did you make? Don’t like it? Choose differently.

Xo

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Rejected…again?

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facetune_14-11-2018-09-44-44I don’t know whether there are people who are unaffected by rejection and if they exist someone point them my way, I need some tips.

I think most would agree that being rejected once, sucks, but multiple times? Its the worst. And yet it’s inevitable, we cannot escape it no matter who we are or where we are from, we have to deal.

So how do we deal? When things aren’t going how we would like, there’s a tendency to lump all bad experiences together and make it one big ball of pain. This undoubtedly makes it more difficult to move past the experience(s).

“I applied for this role and didn’t get it”

“I missed out on getting onto this course because I was shy of 2 points”

“She left me for someone else”

“My colleague was given the promotion over me, although I am more qualified”

Imagine putting all of those together and wondering why you feel so crap afterwards. Don’t do it.

I have taken a number of L’s this year, do I stop? Do I give up? Do I no longer make the effort? No no and no! (And yes I’m definitely guilty of the above, I’m champion woe is me).

Some rejections I was unfazed by, others made me question myself over and over again. It happens to the best of us.

For example, I applied for 6 positions at my current organisation, did you hear me? I said SIX. After the first 2 rejections, I felt like shit. Most of the roles I applied for, I was more than capable of doing based on my skills and experience, but it wasn’t happening and I did not understand why. The feedback I received was positive but I just missed it. To make matters worse:

  • Most of the people I work with have been pushing for me to get something permanent and so I constantly have colleagues coming up to me, giving me information on jobs, agencies and the like…all the time.
  • It’s embarrassing. And whilst I appreciate/d the support it made me feel useless. Like why can’t I get together?! Frustrating to say the least!
  • This was a 6 month contract. I have been here 18 months which I’m thankful for, however MANY people have left and been able to find better roles. I MUST be the problem.

After the 3rd interview and it was a no (the other 3 I never heard back from), I thought right, what’s really happening here? After some reflection I realised apart from improving my interview techniques, my future is not attached to this company at all. I’d be settling here. I enjoy working with the people, however the roles have been something ‘to do’ and that’s definitely not what I want for my life and the universe has heard me.

From these experiences I have learnt that it is best to treat each situation separate from the other. One negative experience, failure or rejection need not be compounded to conclude that you are indeed a “bum”. Instead, focus on the lessons to be learnt.

Rejection does not have to be failure, it can be redirection and a chance to do it differently. You also don’t know what you’re being saved from.

It can be tough and you’ll want wallow in self-pity, but choose to dust yourself off, be a good student, and give it another go.

Xo

Thoughts Become Things

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facetune_22-10-2018-19-30-58My contract is ending soon. The nature of the job means expecting it to terminate at any moment. I know this and had been mentally preparing myself for what could happen next. Out of nowhere I started to think about finances, could I manage if I didn’t get another contract for a little while? Will all my hard work of having everything in order go in the toilet? I could feel the fear beginning to surge through me from my stomach into my head and back down.

I caught it. I reaffirmed that I will be good no matter what and dismissed any other thoughts that contradicted it.

Being able to do that is years of self-awareness and practice. Not all thoughts that travel in and through our minds are our own or ones we want to cultivate and it’s crucial to be able to consciously filter them out.

You might think it’s just one thought, a mere sentence, but it’s bigger than that, it’s a seed. A seed that has the power to create something greater and permanent. Think about it, a tree didn’t always look like a tree.

If we allow ourselves to be consumed with thoughts and things that we do not like nor want, it limits the space we have to receive more of what we do want.

This week, become conscious of what you’re thinking because your mind is fertile ground for what happens next.

xo

Rejection or Re-direction? A Blessing in Disguise

20 Monday Mar 2017

Posted by in Experiences, Less Talk, More Action, Thoughts in motion

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I hope you have missed me? If not, the rest of this post will be blank…try me. Just kidding 😀

Last week Friday I received not so good news. The long and short is I’ll be out of a job soon, as my contract is coming to an end. Womp womp womp.

It’s typical for this to happen just as I have FINALLY warmed up to the idea of being a nine to fiver (for a period of time) and building on a both the vocation and my aspirations simultaneously. But nope I’ll be out on my ass lol.

Thing is I am used to being in and out of work, it’s the life of a work-in-progress entrepreneur. I have lived this way my entire working life but this time around I felt a great sense of disappointment and disqualification. I began to second-guess my purpose and myself.

In instances like these, our outlook can sometimes magnify the negatives and all the problems we have ever had suddenly come into full focus.

After feeling sorry for myself for like a day, I dusted myself off and began to think about the upside. What if this is a prelude to something greater, something that I have always wanted, an even better opportunity?

You have to consider what is this “missed” opportunity saving me from or even leading me onto?

“Every time I thought I was being

rejected from something good

I was actually being redirected to something

better.”- Steve Maraboli

I remember one specific moment as a child where I was super excited to go to a birthday party. My aunty was coming to pick me up and as you know one minute to a child is like an hour. It turned out that my aunty couldn’t make it anymore, I was devastated, well as devastated as an 11 year old could be. My mother said to me “Irene, every disappointment is a blessing in disguise”. What the hell does that even mean to an 11 year old?! But she was right. I ended up having a great time going somewhere else.

The example may sound trivial but it taught me a life long lesson.

Be down just for a moment, then pick yourself up and think what is it I should be paying attention to? What is the great thing that can come from this disappointment? How can I turn this around for my good?

There is always something to be gained in every situation. Don’t think: “What if I fall?” (think) Oh but my darling, What if you fly?”

XO

Change the conversation…now

18 Monday Jul 2016

Posted by in Less Talk, Life, More Action, Thoughts in motion

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We are what we eat.

What we think about, we bring about.

What goes in, must come out.

The theme here is, whatever is going on inside will reflect on your outside world.

What are the things that you believe and think about yourself deep down inside? Those are the exact things that are ruling your existence.

You think positively and are mindful about what you say, yet things are not improving. Well, maybe it’s time you really take a closer look about what you truly think about yourself and your life.

Your life is reflection of the level of self-love you have. This could not be more true.

For example, putting in the work for your dreams to materialize. How much time do you spend doing it? Do you really believe it can happen for you? You want to travel the world, are you making plans for this to happen? You hate the job you’re in, have you looked at applications for your ideal position? Your relationship has broken down and there is no going back, isn’t it time for you to have that difficult conversation?

We often times self-sabotage because we truly don’t feel like it will happen for us, that we are deserving and have the power to change things. We might think it could happen, but we do not believe it will and therefore we act accordingly- We cannot have two masters, that is, where what you think and what you believe are different, one must take precedent.

Why would you leave your terrible partner, if you don’t believe you will have someone who treats you how you want to be treated? Might as well keep the one you have, it’s better than nothing right?

Why would you leave your hated job, if you believe that the next potential employer will think you are under qualified, might as well stay where you are, after all it pays the bills right?

Why would you travel the world, if you believe you will not have the money and end up homeless, I mean none of your friends have such aspirations and have settled for the okey doke, might as well join them, right?

Why would you eat healthier, if you believe you’ll never reach your goal weight, everyone in your family is overweight, unhealthy, and has a multitude of health issues, you are bound to suffer the same, it’s in your DNA, no point in even trying is there?

In fact, why would you do anything at all that you don’t believe in? The answer is you won’t.

Whatever you believe, will be real to you. How do we change the conversation? We change it with action. Follow each new and positive thought with an immediate action that is in alignment with that new thinking or belief. So if you want to eat healthier, write down a list of healthy foods you are going to buy the next time you go shopping. If you are aiming for a new role, download the application form and start filling it in. If you want to attract certain people, go to those places where they are. If you need to release someone from your life, send that text or email to say “we need to talk”, whatever it is, believe in yourself and that you are capable of working it out for your own good.

It takes a lot of courage to change your life, it is no easy feat, but with perseverance, action and commitment, it will get better.

Repetition is the mother of skill. Thought/Belief + action = results. It doesn’t have to be great huge steps, baby ones will make just as much difference in the long run.

Quieten the naysayers in your head, with a new belief backed up with action, repeated over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over…get it?