One day you will be old. At least I hope to be.
As I prepared for bed last night, I took one more glance in the mirror to observe myself, and I had an epiphany; one day I’ll be old and this skin that I’m waiting on to get better, will have lived life and it’ll show.
Many storms would it have weathered.
I will no longer have a choice about the texture of my skin, ageing will fix that permanently, and there’ll be little to nothing I can do about it.
In fact, it probably won’t matter much to me, as staying fit and healthy will be the priority.
I’ll remember all the times I didn’t like how I looked as I wistfully run my fingers over glossy finished photos of my younger self. I’ll wonder why the hell didn’t I think I was beautiful.
I know this because I sometimes do it now and recall how at the time I certainly didn’t think that. I’ll also think what an absolute shame to have not loved all of myself and wasted years wanting and waiting for it be different.
It’s cool to talk about self-love now, but practicing it isn’t as straight-forward.
Self-love in practice is radical. It’s when you begin your inner tirade about what you don’t like about yourself, and stopping midway and then changing the internal discourse to one of praise and kindness towards yourself.
It’s embracing all the parts you have been conditioned to believe is ‘bad’ and ‘unacceptable’ and saying fuck it, its mine and I love it!
It’s seeing yourself as you truly are, and saying yes, this is it.
It’s doing the uncomfortable things, that your future self will thank you for…because when you’re old, the weight of these things won’t hold, regret however, will.
Regret for all that you didn’t do, because of fear, ridicule, and going against the grain.
Have the courage to be fearless, and love you and your life fiercely, as the chance to start from the beginning won’t exist, but loving it right now as it is, does.