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~ Be Live It

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Tag Archives: Thoughts

One At A Time

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Posted by Irene Ephraim in Dreams

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2019, 2020, action, blogger, choice, decision, dreams, Goals, Happy, Thoughts, writer

facetune_18-11-2019-18-17-01-1

 

I really hope this post meets you well.

Can you believe we’re nearly at the end of the year? AND we’re about to enter into a new decade? Wild.

2019 so far for myself and a lot of others, has been a roller coaster of emotions and experiences that we never expected. Things like, unemployment, unplanned pregnancies, incarceration, losing friendships, losing loved ones to death, to name a few things- like I said, a roller coaster.  

I wonder if there is some sort of universal purge happening because we are entering into a new decade? What do you think?

Notwithstanding the party and bullsh*t that life can be, we still have to participate and how we do this, is entirely up to us.

Sure, we’re not in control of a lot of things, but the one of the things we can master is, ourselves. WE are huge contributors to our experiences.

With that said, I want you to think about ONE thing you want to accomplish before the 31st December 2019.

Just one. One, because when we attempt to juggle multiple things at a time the following occurs; very little gets done, you become overwhelmed with how much there is to do, causes frustration and worse than all of that, can make you stagnant.

Once you have decided what that is, close off or shut down anything that does not support the thing you are in the process of accomplishing. That might mean limiting the access others have to you, setting a timetable, changing your environment, exposing yourself to something different and so on.

Chances are, you already know what you have to do, you just don’t want to do it. Take heed to whatever messages you are receiving right now about your life, as its the very thing that will get you closer to where you want to be.

And if you don’t? Well you already know what life will look like because you are living it now. Do yourself one solid before the new year and surprise yourself.

With love, Irene x 

 

A Blessing or a Curse?

11 Monday Feb 2019

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Life, Manifest

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Blessing, Goal, happiness, joy, Law of Attraction, Lifestyle Writer, Love, Manifest, Mind, Monday Motivation, New week, Pain, perception, Reality, Speak, The Secret, Thoughts, vision, words

facetune_08-02-2019-18-32-36-1It’s been a little quiet over here and I’m starting to think that I’m talking to myself and I don’t know how to feel about that. Having said that, I am choosing to believe that I am talking to millions of you. Yes you heard, millions of you.

Last week was rough for many people myself included. All sorts of weird and painful things were happening, but if you’re reading this it’s not too late to turn things around.

It’s a new week and whatever happened last week is now in the past and no longer happening, so what would you like to do next? You can choose to hold onto it OR let go and keep sowing great things now for your future.

One way to turn things around instantly, which you can do right away, is to shift your perception on your reality.

Can it feel fake at first? Yup, but with persistence it will feel normal and this will alter your reality.

For example, many people see paying bills as a chore and a pain instead of gift that affords them the lifestyle they live. Rather than bemoan it, say thank you every time you pay an expense, because you’re effectively being grateful for the things you get to experience everyday that once upon a time was but a dream. You remember what it felt like to not have the money to pay that bill and you had to ask someone for it, well now you don’t have to. That’s a blessing.

Shifting your focus onto what is good about a situation will always bear better fruit than exacerbating an already negative situation.

Pick one thing you want to feel different about and change the story you’ve made about it. Your mind is something you can control and that’s a super power. Use it wisely, be intentional for your good and that of others.

Speaking of which: you will have a great week, receive wonderful news and enjoy being alive with your loved ones 🙂

Xo

Drop the Weight.

29 Thursday Nov 2018

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Life, Thoughts in motion

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Advice, Beautiful, Commitment, Goals, Hump Day, life, Thoughts, vision, Writing

facetune_29-11-2018-17-28-34-3You know what that weight is…it’s the thing you use as an excuse for your lack thereof or mediocrity.

You hold onto it as it makes you feel justified; family, friends, job, money, resources, pretty much anything can sound like a valid reason to not have or do something.

But what you don’t realise, is that until it’s out of the way, it will continue to oppress and hold you back. You will not be able to truly see the gift that is in front of you because there are too many things that you are giving much power to.

Let it go, clean it up or clear it out.

But before even doing that, you have to make a decision.

I had been holding my mother responsible for the reason why I haven’t been able to do a particular thing well for the past few months. She was being herself and I allowed it to impact what and how I did things. I decided to make a commitment to doing better.

Making that decision alone shifted how I thought about things and ultimately how I did it. I wasn’t going to literally wait around anymore, I was going to make improvements for myself. And as usual, the universe conspires in helping you meet your goal.

If you have been holding in or onto something or blaming someone for the shortcomings that are occurring in your life, make a decision to work through them to make the things you want happen. Drop the excuses, develop discipline and hold fast to your determination to see things through.

“I am going to make a very beautiful life for myself no matter what it takes”.

Xo

Thoughts Become Things

22 Monday Oct 2018

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Experiences, Life

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career, Contract, fear, Fertile, Harvest, Job, LOA, Manifest, Mindset, Monday, Seed, success, Things, Thoughts, Work

facetune_22-10-2018-19-30-58My contract is ending soon. The nature of the job means expecting it to terminate at any moment. I know this and had been mentally preparing myself for what could happen next. Out of nowhere I started to think about finances, could I manage if I didn’t get another contract for a little while? Will all my hard work of having everything in order go in the toilet? I could feel the fear beginning to surge through me from my stomach into my head and back down.

I caught it. I reaffirmed that I will be good no matter what and dismissed any other thoughts that contradicted it.

Being able to do that is years of self-awareness and practice. Not all thoughts that travel in and through our minds are our own or ones we want to cultivate and it’s crucial to be able to consciously filter them out.

You might think it’s just one thought, a mere sentence, but it’s bigger than that, it’s a seed. A seed that has the power to create something greater and permanent. Think about it, a tree didn’t always look like a tree.

If we allow ourselves to be consumed with thoughts and things that we do not like nor want, it limits the space we have to receive more of what we do want.

This week, become conscious of what you’re thinking because your mind is fertile ground for what happens next.

xo

As If By Magic

17 Wednesday Oct 2018

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Life, Manifest, Thoughts in motion

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Audi, belief, BMW, Car, Hump Day, Imagine, Law of Attraction, Manifest, Manifestation, Stress, Thoughts, Visualise

img_0870

On Monday I asked you to get imaginative, write it down, make it plain and then dispose of it somewhere. Did you do it? Tut, the insolence! I should turn you all into salt, well if I could and maybe if I was God or Medusa but I’m not, so, erm, anyway…There are many different beliefs about manifesting and the law of attraction, and whilst they work, it really isn’t a one size fits all, at least not in my case.

I have tried the “intentional focus on something” and all that happens is me becoming increasingly stressed with little to no results. From memory, everything I deeply wanted and or became “obsessed” with I did not get, whereas the things I’d give very little thought to, voila!

This had always perplexed me until I wrote down my manifestation system earlier on this year. I had to see in writing what I had known worked for me and not focus on what had worked for others. Turns out I have used this system since I were a small child, and can recall many occasions where things materialised in a swift fashion. Maybe you’re like me where the other methods simply don’t work, and if so, here’s a few things I have learned.

1. You have to be relaxed about your want. Any kind of worry, stress, excessive attention will not work.

2. Do not be attached to the outcome. It is very easy to miss what is for you by clinging onto an ideal.

3. You can absolutely act on your desire, but again you must employ point 1 & 2 (see example below).

4. You mustn’t obsess about it.

5. Be open. Not everything we think we want do we actually want.

6. Continue on with your daily life.

In November 2014 a friend and I walked into the Audi dealership to look at the cars. I wanted a new car but didn’t have the means to purchase it, I simply went to look. I test drove the Audi A3, liked it and that was that.

I mentioned to another friend on the 20th December 2014 that I wanted to get a BMW 1 Series. Again, no means, just putting it out there.

On the 27th December 2014 (window shopping again, I’m great at that), I left a dealership with a BMW 1 series without having spent any of my own money, ha! I had gone there with a credit card, my fair credit score, my mother, boyfriend, courage and hope.

My mother put a substantial amount of money down and the rest would be on me for the next 2 years. Huh?! How? I said I. Did. Not. Have. The. Means?!

I wasn’t expecting her to be involved, I had just turned 27, I’m grown, I can do bad all by myself, I wasn’t asking for a thing! She and my boyfriend at the time were only accompanying me as people do with things like this, and yet here I was leaving with a car that I hadn’t paid for.

Looking back, what I did was;

i) knew I wanted a new car ii) didn’t know how I’d get it, iii) put myself in a position to see me driving the car iv) didn’t stress myself about it, v) the vehicle in which I would receive it showed up vi) drove off into the sunset…okay it was night time and during the winter, same difference (lol).

I have plenty other examples where I have practiced as above and it happens, and a number of instances where I was super focused and very little happened.

I want to be clear here, manifesting isn’t solely about material things, its everything; mindset, people, healing, and so on. Also, it does not discriminate, it can work for both positive and negative things, so be mindful.

img_2991Give it a go. I might do a series on this because there’s levels to it. Maybe the next one will be on how I jumped out of a plane.

Yup, this is me on the 17th December 2016 (my birthday), I screamed like a lil’ bitch for the first few seconds ha! but that’s a story for another time.

Xo

SShhh Don’t Talk About It

29 Monday Jan 2018

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Experiences, Travel

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action, Experiences, Goals, inspire, Malta, Manifest, Mindset, Monday Motivation, Non-fiction, Self-help, Speaker, success, Thoughts, travel, words, Work, writer

I just got back from a solo trip to Malta. If you have ever tried to organise a trip away with others you’ll know how incredibly frustrating it can be. After months of trying to get it together with others, I scrapped those efforts and said right I’m going alone! I didn’t tell anyone until it was all booked. It was exactly what I needed. It enhanced my confidence in myself, that I can do it alone and although it’d be nice to have a companion, I am certainly enough.

Want to do something? Do it. Don’t allow the perfect time, thing or person prevent you from making that move. I have learnt then when you go ahead, the people that are for you will come to you in due time. Whilst in Malta, a friend in London told me he used to live there and that he can put me in contact with a friend of his to take me out and that’s exactly what happened. Within a few hours I was out exploring their night life.

Another thing to do or not do in this case, is talk about it. We all know what it feels like to talk about something and it not materialise, it’s embarrassing. I’m now operating on a strictly need to know basis, not purely because of the embarrassment, but what it does is allow me to work in private without the influence of others that ‘don’t get it’. A lot of the time all talking about it does is waste energy that you really could be using to actually do it. If you have to talk about it, speak about it to people who have done it or are doing it. You have to constantly keep yourself in alignment with the thing that you’re doing. You cannot afford to speak to those who are on a completely different path, because believe it or not they have the power to derail you. Would an architect speak to yoga instructor about their project? No, unless it’s about how to practice mediation with exercise then Bobs your uncle. Now, that’s not to say they can’t provide great insights, it’s just a ground you have to tread VERY lightly-assess them by their fruits.

So, nurture your goals in private and diligently, protect your mind, get in alignment and surround yourself with people doing the work and watch your life change.

Xo

It’s Not You, It’s Me.

23 Tuesday Jan 2018

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Lessons Learnt, Life, Relationships

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challenge, change, Feelings, growth, Identity, Internal, Lessons, lifestyle, Love, Mind, Mindset, Negative, Perfect, Positive, problem, relationship, self, self love, Self-care, Thoughts, writer

Whenever we take up issue with something or someone else, it is usually an indication of a greater issue that we have going on internally. For example, if you’re jealous of someone else’s looks or life, what that might be saying is that you have low self-esteem and do not see yourself as valuable. There may already be a feeling of inadequacy in existence, which seeing another person further aggravates.  

I recently had a situation where I felt like someone wasn’t as attentive as I would have liked. I worked myself up for days going over the details, but I knew that the issue didn’t really lie with them, it was me. I didn’t feel good enough, I didn’t have great confidence in myself, I didn’t believe I was worthy. During that period I acknowledged that I had some work to do on myself. And no it’s not easy nor does it happen overnight.

You see the problem isn’t always about the other person and what they did, in many instances it’s about us and how we truly feel about ourselves. This is part of the reason why it’s so important to focus on ourselves, because when we shift it onto something or someone else to avoid dealing with the problem, we do ourselves and the people around us a disservice. It’s a disservice because we’re not able to tap into the crux of what is happening, which ultimately shapes our world and the experiences we have. We cannot live at or give our best if we do this. If we don’t address it internally, we can never change it externally. 

So the next time someone’s actions or presence evokes a negative reaction or feeling in you, think about what it is really saying about you, is there something for you to work on? And if so don’t be afraid of it. Broach it with care and take your time, but whatever you do, do not ignore it. 

 Xo

The Year of Realisations

12 Tuesday Dec 2017

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Experiences, Late night, Lessons Learnt, Life

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Family, friends, friendships, Honest, Introspection, Late night, Learnt, Lesson, Lessons, life, Love, Relationships, Thirties, Thoughts, trust, writer, Writing

As much as some find it purposeful, my writing is my remedy and I hope you’ll allow me to continue to use this platform to express myself as necessary and bear with me whilst I go through this weird phase.

A friend of mine would often say “Wow, the year of realisations” in response to anything (usually funny stuff) that takes her by surprise. I have a similar use for that phrase except the surprises are a bit more painful than funny.

I have recently had to question and re-evaluate some of the friendships that I have and it hurts to know that perception isn’t always reality.

The realisation that the esteem I held people in isn’t mutual is a hard pill to swallow. What concerns me more is having to look at myself and ask how did I get it so wrong? Why did I give of myself in a way that would yield such little return or regard?

I share this purely to show that irrespective of who anyone is, everyone deals with similar things.

How will I go forward with this new ‘enlightenment?’ Time and wise counsel from God. The one thing I do not want to do is harden my heart and become bitter, because let’s be real that will do more damage to me than it’ll ever do to them.

Relationships of any kind are hard work and require consistent reciprocal effort, compromise and compassion. If these are missing then it’s time to release the noose from around your neck and free yourself.

You cannot be of service from an empty space, you have to be full and part of that comes through your relationships with others.

Remember this, if there’s no love in it, leave it.

…In other news this is how I’m trying to be for the rest of the week:


LIT!

Xo

P.s I’ll be back to normal asap.

One Person Can

15 Wednesday Nov 2017

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Experiences, Life, Thoughts in motion

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challenge, change, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Difference, Hump Day, Impact, opportunity, power, Thoughts, writer

A new opportunity has arisen for me and I subsequently began to think about the possibilities of what I’ll be able to do, change and improve upon. The excitement of it all boiled over. And then one thought stopped me in my tracks, “I’m one person, can I really make the difference I envision making?”. I immediately felt a sense of dejection.

“How can I, one small person make an impact? I am inexperienced and who’ll take me seriously anyway?…”. I fortunately wasn’t granted the liberty of continuing on that downward spiral because I was reminded of all the amazing things we get to enjoy and learn from in our society that was brought about by ONE person making the decision to be the change they wanted to see.

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is one of the people I admire. Her books, intellect and being her unapologetic self, are a few things that both inspire and teach me…but what if? What if she decided that her voice wasn’t worth being heard? What if she decided that Purple Hibiscus is a pile of crap and dumped it in the bin? What if she never picked up a pen? I shudder.

Chimamanda

So this is for me as it is for you, don’t allow your current circumstances, inexperience or insecurities deprive you of believing that you are necessary and what you have to offer is valuable. Hold on to that little voice telling you can, because you can.

Xo

P.s How’s your challenge going?

 

Who’s Whispering In Your Ear?

01 Wednesday Nov 2017

Posted by Irene Ephraim in Experiences, Motivation

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influence, Motivation, Negative, Positive, Thoughts, Whisper, World

Who’s whispering in your ear?

Do the people around you validate your fears? Do they exacerbate an already bad situation with their opinions and presence? Do they tell you about all the terrible ways they have dealt with things and encourage you to do the same? Do they knock your dreams? If so, drop them, now!

I am very very mindful about who I confide in concerning the matters of my life. One of the things I recommend not doing, is going around telling any and everyone who would listen about your problems or aspirations and here’s why:

When you speak to people who do not see the bigger picture, who are perpetually negative, who do not aspire to do or be better, whose life’s a constant mess, you’ll end up in the same position that you’ve always been in or worse still in the position they have always been. Their words and actions are infectious, make no mistake about it.

You need people in your life that will challenge your behaviour and thoughts, who will correct you when you’re wrong, who will give you a different perspective on things, who are actively in pursuit of manifesting their dreams and who have accomplished many and great things in their lives. You DO NOT want to speak to those who have achieved nothing great or positive, have given up on their dreams, who are constant complainers and always have something negative to say. You might not know it but the words and things you hear and see are shaping the world around you every single day. They are more influential than you think as whatever goes into your ears and eyes feeds you.

A couple of times a month or more I drive through the area I want to live in because I have to be reminded of my goals and what’s possible. If there is nothing around you that reiterates what you want in your life, you have to go there physically. Take yourself there through what you listen to, who you speak to, where you go, what you do and lastly through your imagination. And you always have your imagination. 

…Psst, let me whisper something in your ear, come closer, a bit more, perfect, go be great.

whisper

Xo

 

Why Didn’t You Warn Me?!

Why Didn't You Warn Me?!

Why Didn't You Warn Me?! is a podcast speaking on the things you should know, but don't. The things you typically find out after the fact, and it's sometimes too late. Fear not, Why Didn't You Warn Me?! with Irene aka Lipstick, will give you the 411 through story-telling, conversations, and refreshing perspectives.

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