Tag Archives: travel

Are You Sure You Want This?

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Sunday night I say my prayers, set my intentions, I feel good and I go to sleep.

Before 8 am this morning, I had 2 unexpected things pop up with a promise to throw me off track.

I say to myself ‘It’ll be fine, I’ll handle it’.

I jump in the shower and as I scrub myself I suddenly remember one of the intentions I had set the night before: ‘I want to strengthen my mind (positively)…’. It dawns on me that those 2 “pop ups” were a part of my “mind strengthening training”. I laugh at the physical representations of it and mentally accept the challenge.

What is the challenge? Don’t lose my shit, maintain a good attitude and alter the way I do and respond to things to further develop my character.

Anyway, I have work to get to and I must be there for 9 am. One of the managers is up my crack and onto me and I’m never one to fall back from a challenge and I like to prove points, so like I said I must be on time.

I leave out and I’m doing okay for time. I arrive at the closest underground station to me and there’s 100’s of people at the top of the escalators. The Jubilee Line has a fault. Now if you know me, you know commuting is one of my least favourite things. I think I vocally complain about it at least once a week so this is not good and like I said I HAVE A POINT TO PROVE (wtf is the universe ignoring me?). We’re all hanging around waiting to be told that service will resume. It doesn’t. Instead they tell us the line has been suspended both ways. Feck.

By this point I am teetering on resorting back to my usual reaction to situations like this.  I can feel the urge coming up from my stomach  creeping up on me, but I utter no words for fear of undoing my efforts. I won’t go out like that. I plan another route to get to work.

Upon arriving at the alternative route, I walk down the stairs looking towards the platform to see if the train has arrived as it’s due now. I see the train is there, but it hasn’t quite pulled up to the full length of the platform yet. That’s odd. I overhear a bystander tell someone something about the train but I only caught bits of it, so I asked her what she had just said.

‘A person has jumped in front of the train’. What?! Okay, this is too much mental strength training for me in one morning. You mean to tell me a likely dead body is somewhere underneath this very train I am looking at? It deeply saddens me and my eyes well. Whoever they were, was in so much mental turmoil and pain that they couldn’t bear the thought of living another day. If you’ve ever been depressed or suicidal you know just how much of a battle it is.

I attempt to say a prayer for them ‘I hope they have peac…’. I don’t quite finish the sentence or really know what to say. Can a person who took their own life have peace in death? What about the afterlife? Is there really an afterlife? Too much to think about.  There goes my morale.

I eventually make it into work 2 hours and 50 minutes after I left my house, for what usually is a 1 hour journey door to door. Time: 10:50 am. Oh, have I mentioned I’m a contractor so every hour counts…fun.

Don’t get me wrong I know some of the above pales in comparison to things others have to deal with, but this is what’s mine.

I share of all of that to say this: Be aware of what you are asking for and what you want.

You usually hear be careful what you ask for, but I think it’s equally important to be aware of it, because whatever you want or ask for, you will be tested by it and if you are unable to recognise it when it comes, you’ll abuse and lose it.

Being aware puts you in a better position to readily succeed at, improve and appreciate the thing that you have asked for. It also helps to manage your expectations. For example, some women want husbands that are rich. Nothing wrong with that right? Except the reality of that might look like him working long hours, travelling the world, being available to his work responsibilities 24/7, missing important dates, forgetting important dates, and so on. Being wealthy usually comes with huge responsibilities and yes the payoff is nice but at what price?

You want to be a world class athlete? That’ll mean changing your diet, knowing every single ingredient in your food and its properties, being disciplined, limiting social outings, training every single day, and the list goes on.

Get my drift?

I wanted to reinforce my mind to be steadily positive and what I have been faced with are things to build more of a resistance to negativity or things not going as planned and because I am aware of this, I can effectively adjust to meet this need. Will I always do right? Um no. But I can always do better.

So, what have you asked for? Is it here? And how are you rising to the occasion?

Xo

For anyone who’s in need, please help yourself here.

SShhh Don’t Talk About It

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I just got back from a solo trip to Malta. If you have ever tried to organise a trip away with others you’ll know how incredibly frustrating it can be. After months of trying to get it together with others, I scrapped those efforts and said right I’m going alone! I didn’t tell anyone until it was all booked. It was exactly what I needed. It enhanced my confidence in myself, that I can do it alone and although it’d be nice to have a companion, I am certainly enough.

Want to do something? Do it. Don’t allow the perfect time, thing or person prevent you from making that move. I have learnt then when you go ahead, the people that are for you will come to you in due time. Whilst in Malta, a friend in London told me he used to live there and that he can put me in contact with a friend of his to take me out and that’s exactly what happened. Within a few hours I was out exploring their night life.

Another thing to do or not do in this case, is talk about it. We all know what it feels like to talk about something and it not materialise, it’s embarrassing. I’m now operating on a strictly need to know basis, not purely because of the embarrassment, but what it does is allow me to work in private without the influence of others that ‘don’t get it’. A lot of the time all talking about it does is waste energy that you really could be using to actually do it. If you have to talk about it, speak about it to people who have done it or are doing it. You have to constantly keep yourself in alignment with the thing that you’re doing. You cannot afford to speak to those who are on a completely different path, because believe it or not they have the power to derail you. Would an architect speak to yoga instructor about their project? No, unless it’s about how to practice mediation with exercise then Bobs your uncle. Now, that’s not to say they can’t provide great insights, it’s just a ground you have to tread VERY lightly-assess them by their fruits.

So, nurture your goals in private and diligently, protect your mind, get in alignment and surround yourself with people doing the work and watch your life change.

Xo

20 Things to Know in Your 20’s – Part 2

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Continuing on from my last post on Sunday, here are the next 10 things I have learnt in my 20’s:

  1. Not everyone’s opinion matters, in fact yours is the most important. And if yours is self-depreciating then you need to remedy that immediately effectively.
  2. Heartbreak hurts like a bitch but one day you will be better. I was in love with someone for years and I honestly thought my little heart will never mend. It did. Now, I look back and laugh (cackle) at how dramatic that period of my life was. It was also one of the biggest teachers I have ever had
  3. Don’t be okay with the okey doke. If you believe you can have different, then go for it irrespective of what people say or the environment you are in. Many Greats started at the very bottom
  4. For my ladies, you can say no to sex if you don’t want to. Men, you don’t have to sleep with a girl, you control your membrane. Society might encourage that behaviour but for us all it is okay to say no, not today. The opposite is also okay too. But do so with caution and sense
  5. Let go. It requires way too much to hold on
  6. Cut and or reduce communication with those that do not add to your life. Honestly, the power is in your hands. You absolutely have a say in who should be in your life and who shouldn’t. It takes one person to ruin your life, don’t let that happen on your watch
  7. Travel. If it’s your thing and even if it’s not, a few visits to new places won’t hurt you, it’ll enrich you
  8. Work on your discipline. To live the life you want will require sacrifice and discipline. Otherwise years will go by and nothing in your life would have changed.
  9. Think carefully about what you want your future to look like and start to work on it now.
  10. People will let you down, repeatedly and you’ll do the same to others. Its life, nobody is perfect, don’t beat yourself up about it (I’m working on this as we speak), just do better

I hope you find some of the 10 tips useful, what are your tips?

Xo

Wanderers of the World 

22 Friday May 2015

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I’ve returned and have been integrated back (with some, actually a lot of resistance) into the thrills of London life,womp womp wooommmppp!

I thought it best to give you an update on my trip away alone, before I discuss anything else.

First off, it was AMAZING! I loved every bit of it, including getting lost. I have always wanted to travel and be incognito, live as the locals do. It’s great exploring a place with tourist eyes but to do so through a native’s eye is even better in my opinion. I wanted to be submerged in their culture without the privilege of being a British national (let’s not pretend that there aren’t some advantages accosted to the British).

There were many observations I was able to make as a result of being alone, things I would not have noticed if I had a companion.

One of the highlights for me, believe it or not, was commuting. Now for those that know me, commuting on London transport doesn’t make any of my highlights and for good reason. I enjoyed studying the faces of the commuters and deciphering what they paid attention to. As a visitor, I hadn’t a clue about what stood out or what was okay to do or not, so it really gave me the opportunity to learn the people, like they say when in Rome, do as the Romans do. I found it really easy to get around and I think I blended in very well, bar my Pharrell looking hat, that occasionally granted me side way glances and a few compliments too!

Another significant benefit was the FREEDOM to do whatever I wanted. I went there with no concrete plan but to simply enjoy being in a different environment and I would do whatever took my fancy. If I felt like having a quick drink in Seventy Eight (a bar in El Poble Sec), that I stumbled across on route back to my apartment, I did, if I wanted to go into the museum that I just walked past (Erotic Museum, don’t ask, I was feeling erh curious, listen I’m grown lol) I did, if I wanted to hop on the Metro and go to the beach (didn’t quite make the beach but took the cable car to Montjuic Hill) I did. There were no hesitations or debating, just doing! Which can sometimes be counter-productive when with others, too many cooks spoil the broth.

You get to learn an immense amount because you have no one else to rely on but yourself. You discover more about the city, the language, the culture, and the general idiosyncrasies. You are forced to ask questions, otherwise how else will you learn? It is a great way to open up dialogue and mingle with the locals.

So here are a few tips on travelling alone:

  • Don’t be shy, ask questions! You’ll meet new people and save yourself a lot of hassle! Always cross check the information they provide as sometimes they may not be well informed themselves. Believe and rely in your abilities.
  • Whatever you wouldn’t do at home, consider not doing abroad. It’s not restricted to this and it does require research, common sense and intuition. On the first day I made enquires at the hotel on if it was safe to travel to the city after 7 pm.  I really didn’t know how things operated and didn’t want to leave the area if it wasn’t ideal to do so. They told me it was but to be aware of pickpockets, I think that goes for most places in the world. On another occasion, I was buying sweets from a stall and a dubious looking character stood next to me, attempting to engage in conversation. He spoke to me in Spanish and French and I told him English only. The lady, serving me felt the same way I did, and moved to another point to finish the transaction. I instantly knew it was because she didn’t want me bringing out my money next to where he stood. Right as she gave me my change, in a sweet but concerned voice, whilst looking me straight in the eye said ‘Be very careful, okay?’ as her eyes fleeted across to the questionable man. I thanked her and told her I will. I was gone with the wind, she did not have to tell me twice! Thank you nice lady!
  •  Keep the important things nearby- (I preferred on my body, slightly paranoid, slightly controlling) and or in a safe and secure place.
  •  Explore, Explore, Explore! (with caution)
  •  Practice your selfie skills.

Will I be travelling alone again? ABSOLUTELY!

The Road Less Travelled…

13 Wednesday May 2015

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I write this post on my flight to Barcelona for a quick break. 

I am travelling alone *queues song* ‘all by myseeellllffffff”yes, you heard, by myself. I’m not meeting anyone there, nor do I know anyone. I am literally entering unknown territory. Although it poses no direct dangers, it’s still a nerving yet exciting prospect-Beating to your own drum.

When I told my mum, two days ago, that I was going away by myself she exclaimed ‘Irene why? You’re so impatient, why couldn’t you wait for a friend? ‘ -_- (prior to booking the trip it had been 2 months of negotiating).There’s a reason I tell my parents last minute, because in typical parental fashion, I am bound to hear a list of what I shouldn’t do, and whys. But when it’s already done and so close to the time, there’s little that can be said to change my mind and I like it that way :). Rebel? Not really, well maybe a little bit.

Travelling alone isn’t something people from my background do often, it’s kind of weird to us and to be honest, it wasn’t my first decision. I had spoken to a number of friends about travelling together and made several attempts to find something suitable for us, but nothing seemed to work with any of them. It was either the cost of holiday or trying to match our schedules and after going through this process with 5+ friends, it became tideous  and incredibly frustrating and as my mother already mentioned I am impatient.

I was still looking at holidays to fit in with a friend and then I had a thought, ‘sod it, I’m going by myself!’. No more ‘trying’ to make it work to their favour, after all it was MY desire. To be frank, the friends in question didn’t help ease the process either *major side eye*, I still love you though lol. 
If there is one with thing I detest, it’s putting your desires and aspirations on hold, in waiting for someone to be ready or get with the programme and I wasn’t about to let that happen. I needed to be on new soil and have new experiences and that’s exactly what I was going to do. 

I must say, I was inspired by a lady I met on my last holiday in France, who told me she travelled all the time by herself and thoroughly enjoyed it. I remember thinking at the time, what a brave thing to do, not knowing that in few months time that would be me. (Ooww! my ears are popping from the pressure) 

I haven’t felt this liberated in a very long time and I find myself cheesing whilst in transit, because I actually did it! (We are about to land now). I had a couple of friends say jokingly ‘You’re my hero’ because of my choice to travel alone as it’s not something people from my area do often. 

I do hope that in reality, it encourages someone to go forth in boldness for what they want. The right time or circumstance seldom come around, you have to make it that way. No matter what or who, pursue your desires with much fervency and you will be rewarded. 

I’m here now, see you xo